It is not uncommon for people to experience emotional pain at a depth so keen that it spills over into their creative expression. Life on this earth is rife with disappointment and heartbreak. We do, after all, live in a world that has fallen from grace. There is this idea that floats through the church that suggests you, as a believer, should not participate in this sort of grief. Where does that come from? Does scripture tell us to “suck it up, buttercup” when pain dominates our reality? On the contrary, your Father sees your pain and wants to join you in it.
The psalms of David are a man’s response to grief and struggle. David did not stop writing music because he was in pain. He did not abandon his belief in God in his loneliness and frustration. He cried out to God, and in his vulnerability allowed the Father to heal him. He is continuously redirecting his gaze to God. “Turn to me and be gracious to me,” David sings, “Oh guard my soul and deliver me!”
Similarly, Jesus shows us, perhaps, the most powerful example of perseverance through pain. In the garden of Gethsemane he collapsed to the ground, focused in his prayer. He cried out to heaven, begging for his father to spare him. Heaven responds, but not as you might expect. Jesus is not spared his coming suffering; but an angel appeared to strengthen him. Does this mean that he suddenly stops crying out and praying? By no means. His prayer intensifies after the angel comes “and being in agony he prayed more earnestly and his sweat became like great drops of blood falling down to the ground.”
You are not promised a pain-free life. You are promised the love of your Father. Do not stop creating because you are hurting. Instead, create as you grieve with the Lord. Let Him meet you in your process and lead you to healing.