God, Sex and Your Marriage

Lie #4: Some Things Are Beyond Forgiving

A few years ago, I sat across from a friend who told me an unbelievable story of forgiveness. I had heard the story before but had no idea that she was the main character – the woman who chose to forgive. My friend forgave her husband for something that much of the world, even Christians, views as unforgivable. How could a wife forgive her husband for sexually violating their child?

My friend’s testimony brought me face-to-face with conclusions I had made about what sins are “forgivable.” In my own mind, I had reasoned through the years that some offenses are just too great to be forgiven. Certainly, this was one of them.

My thinking, though logical, was far from Biblical. Jesus made a big deal about the importance of forgiving one another. He went so far as to say that if we refuse to forgive someone else, He will not forgive our sins. That’s pretty serious! Notice that when Jesus taught about forgiveness, He never categorized offenses or excused things that are just too great to forgive.

Your enemy would like you to believe that your spouse or other people who have hurt you shouldn’t be forgiven. He may have convinced you that holding onto your anger and bitterness will keep you safe from further betrayal or harm. Just as nothing is too great for Jesus to forgive, there is no offense that justifies a hard heart.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean that the person who hurt you gets “off the hook.” It means that you trust the Lord to bring righteousness in His time. Forgiveness also doesn’t necessarily mean full reconciliation of a relationship. When trust has been broken, it must be rebuilt. However, forgiveness means that, as far as it depends upon you, you are at peace with everyone (Romans 12:18).

Question to ponder:
Have you subconsciously made a list of “unforgivable” sins?

Action Step:
If there is a person (dead or alive) that you have refused to forgive, bring that situation before the Lord. Ask Him what step to take in cementing the decision to walk in forgiveness.