Raising Spirit-Led Kids Sample

 Do Not (Always) Tell the Truth

Jesus told us that in order to live in freedom, we need to know the truth. This also means that if we believe lies, we will not live a life of freedom. In other words, the areas of our lives in which we are not walking in freedom reveal where we are believing lies. We also know that one of the devil’s primary tools is lying, since he is “the father of lies.” 

We all have times when our children (or spouses) are struggling with the lies that come at them. Most of the time our go-to solution is to come right out and tell them the truth about the situation. If our child says, “Nobody likes me,” we often respond immediately with, “That’s not true!” We might even try to convince them that they are wrong about what they are feeling. 

If you have ever used this strategy with your children, you should take a step back to analyze how well it is working. Did they agree with you when you told them the truth? Did they come out of their emotional frustration and back into joy? Most parents I have spoken to about this tell me that they speak truth to their kids, but it does not seem to help. 

If the answer is that we should not always tell our children the truth, what can we do to help them? We should question the lies. This practice can help them begin to get out of “the feeling brain” and get back into “the thinking brain.” As we ask them questions, we are building in them a new way of thinking. In the future when they hear lies, the questions that we ask them now will pop up in their heads without us having to be there. Asking questions to help them think through the lies also empowers them to recognize and stop believing them. When we do this, we are leading them to ask Jesus for His input in the situation. As this is happening, there is no hammer of truth trying to hit the lie, but rather a firm and loving hand taking hold of the lie and wiggling it loose. 

Ask God to help you determine when you should challenge a lie your child is tempted to believe, and when you should question the lie. Ask Him to give you questions you can use to lead your child to the truth.