Blended Family: Becoming Stepfamily SmartSample

Stepfamily Rewards

Luke 4:18 tells us that he was sent to proclaim good news to the poor, the prisoner, the blind, and the oppressed. Jesus came to turn spiritual outsiders into insiders. All of us—you and me—were outsiders until his grace found us and made us his sons and daughters. One response of embracing this good news is humble gratitude.

When gratitude takes root in stepfamily members it can result in insiders (biological family members) making the powerful choice to embrace outsiders (stepfamily members). For example, when stepparents and stepchildren emulate Christ and invite one another in, something powerful happens. The uncomfortable outsider finds belonging, jealous and hardened hearts soften, selfishness dissipates in the face of sacrifice and love, and God is made central in that home. This is a profound reward every blended family would relish. But there's more.

Healthy stepfamilies can experience many rewards including some of the following:

• High quality marriages. Couples can create mutually satisfying, intimate, God-honoring marriages within stepfamilies.
• A new marital heritage to celebrate. For children of divorce a healthy marital relationship can counteract the negative and destructive patterns of marriage they witnessed in their parent's divorce.
• Healthier kids. A loving, well-functioning stepfamily over time can negate many of the detrimental psychological impacts of divorce on children.
• Shared respect and care between stepparents and stepchildren. Children, once empty due to the abandonment of a parent, can bloom under the loving care of a stepparent.
• Experienced love, extended grace. When stepfamily members extend love and grace to one another and "bring the outsider in" they are emulating God's grace to them. In so doing, children are blessed, hurts are healed, and the family is redeemed to God's glory.

This is good news!

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