Managing Your AngerSample

It Matters to Your Children

Most dads know the joy of accidentally stepping on a Lego piece barefoot.

After the sudden jolt of pain—and perhaps some choice words—you probably start looking around for a child to blame.

This is just one example of men navigating fatherhood and, more specifically, our tempers, as we raise our children.

I highlight “temper” in particular because of this week's devotional theme, and because how we manage our tempers can greatly impact our sons and daughters.

In today’s Scripture, the apostle Paul fondly recounts his previous visit to the Thessalonian believers. Though not a father himself, Paul outlines how he had tried to behave as an ideal Christian father to them: “encouraging, comforting and urging you to live lives worthy of God” (1 Thessalonians 2:12 NIV).

There is surely plenty of variety in our parenting styles. Some dads may prefer a soft approach, while others may lean toward being more like drill sergeants. We probably adjust our approach depending on the child, their age, the circumstances—and who is watching us!

However, today’s passage's descriptors of being “encouraging” and “comforting” are fitting for all dads.

We were all children once, and though there’s certainly a time and place for “drill sergeant” parenting, we all know the power of encouragement. How devastating it is when a child looks for their father’s supportive “You can do it!” but all they see and hear is anger and disapproval!

The same goes for a child’s need for comfort. It’s not just the mother’s job because she’s supposed to be maternal. We can emulate the love of our Heavenly Father and console our kids, even if they’re aloof teenagers or grown-ups today. When we offer up our short temper when our children are hurting, it’s difficult for our child to forget that experience, especially if it becomes repetitive.

In the past, I’ve lost it many times with my children. Sure, a man should confront a child’s disrespect, but too many times, my temper won the day needlessly. Hopefully, I’ve shown my children enough love and kindness over the years to outweigh the times I lost my temper.

We want to prepare our children to be healthy and godly adults. Dads need to manage their ungodly anger so that our children can truly appreciate the times we encourage and comfort them as we should.

Prayer: Father God, thank You for being compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in love. May I be slow to anger with my children, encouraging and comforting them well in Jesus’ Name. Amen.

Reflection: What are some of your best moments of being patient with your children? When were you an encourager and comforter to them? What incidents do you regret, when you lost your temper with them? What have you learned from all these experiences?