How to Use Your Marriage as Your Best Parenting ToolSample

Unity Over Perfection

Your kids don't need perfect parents. What they truly need are parents who keep choosing one another—especially when it's hard.

Unity in marriage doesn't mean you never disagree. It means you remain committed even in disagreement. It's about standing side by side, not because everything is easy, but because love is stronger than conflict.

Many couples believe their children should never witness conflict. While it's wise to protect them from yelling, name-calling, or harmful tension, shielding them from all disagreements can do more harm than good. Why? Because if they never see healthy conflict, they won't know how to navigate it themselves.

Kids who never witness disagreement often miss seeing what reconciliation looks like, too. They miss seeing what Colossians 3:13-14 calls us to do: bearing with one another, forgiving one another, and putting on love to bind us together in perfect unity.

Without that example, children can grow up believing that peace means sweeping things under the rug instead of putting them on the table with grace. They may never learn that it's possible to have different opinions and still stand united. But when you model healthy conflict and forgiveness, you give them something powerful—a picture of real unity.

You teach them that love can endure, even through tension. You show them that disagreement doesn't equal division. And you remind them, as Mark 3:25 says, that"a house divided against itself cannot stand"—but a house rooted in Christ and committed to unity can.

Reflection Question:
How can you model unity—especially in a disagreement—so your children learn that healthy conflict doesn't destroy love?