Loving Through ListeningSample

Your Presence Matters

In Psalm 3:3 David cries out to God asking him to be a shield and a “lifter of my head.” This lifting is a gift you can offer. Essentially your way of being present says to them that you will not join the ranks of anyone who shames them for being “too much” or “not enough” or for “being too out of step morally”, and so on. You are there to lift their downcast eyes to a loving gaze that forgives and welcomes the weak and the wounded back home. Brené Brown said,

“One of the most valuable gifts in my life was from my mom. She taught us to never look away from pain. The lesson was simple and clear:

Don’t look away. Don’t look down. Don’t pretend not to see hurt.

Look people in the eye. Even when their pain is overwhelming.

And when you’re hurting and in pain, find people who can look you in the eye.

We need to know we’re not alone—especially when we’re hurting.”

We ALL experience seasons of pain and suffering, and we experience seasons of being able to offer comfort and care. Both thread through our individual stories. This is not their first or their last difficult season, but it is part of their growth and maturity. In a sense, it helps to convey, “You are right on time, and this is familiar to Jesus—He is well acquainted with grief.”

What an opportunity to see, hear, honor, and engage another, as people on the same path, in the middle of a journey, meeting in a sacred moment arranged by God for his purposes in two lives!

Henri Nouwen speaks to this connective togetherness brilliantly and beautifully:

“When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares.”

As you ponder all this with God today, ask Him:

Father, show me when you have been the God of all comfort in my story; when you or someone else has lifted my head while I was lonely, feeling overwhelmed, heartbroken, or grieving.

Jesus, when I’ve shared my story, how has my heart been handled?

Holy Spirit, help me to name the hurting places in my heart and story. Comforter, tend to these hurting places, and bring your healing balm.