Big Red Switch

As I enter this time of prayer, I repeat the words of Psalm 16:1–2, slowly, several times, making them my prayer to God:

‘Keep me safe, O God, I’ve run for dear life to you.

I say to GOD, “Be my Lord!” Without you, nothing makes sense’ (MSG).

Pause and repeat

‘How happy are those who know what sorrow means for they will be given courage and comfort!’ (Matt. 5:4 PHILLIPS).

Pete writes, ‘Sammy and I would not want to go back, of course, to the dark days of brain surgery. But neither would we want to go back to the days before our lives were hijacked by fear. I guess we prefer the people we have become through all these contradictions.’

Can I see any positive ways in which the Holy Spirit might be using my sorrow for good? Are there any signs of Him changing me in some way through these difficult times?

Pause and reflect

Father, if You were to hand me a big red switch to solve my problems and heal my pain, I’d flick it without hesitation. But in the absence of that switch, please at least make something good out of this mess. Don’t let this ugly situation make me ugly. Give me ‘beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair’ (Isa. 61:3).

Pause and pray

Our closing prayer over the next few days is going to be the prayer of Jesus in Gethsemane, which we studied at the start of this devotional. But before praying these famous words, I clench my fists, holding in my left hand my greatest desire (the miracle I need God to do) and in my right my deepest dread:

‘Abba, Father … everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me’ (Mark 14:36a).

I open my left hand to offer God my deepest desire and to ask for a miracle.

‘Yet not my will, but yours be done’ (Luke 22:42b).

I open my right hand and, naming my deepest dread, I make the difficult decision to relinquish control.

Amen.