The SYMBIS Assessment PlanSample

Context: Finances

“Why do you always make the money decisions?” Leslie asked me.

We were standing in the middle of a department store trying to choose a new couch for our apartment. And it seemed to her that I was controlling the purse strings.

“I don’t make the money decisions,” I said, “our bank account does.”

That remark was followed by a lengthy, whiny discussion — okay, it was a fight — over how we manage, or should manage, our money. Was I in charge or were we in charge? It’s an important question for all of us.

I don’t know how you would answer that question but if you are like most people we counsel you might be saying, “We can talk about almost anything except money.” And that’s understandable. Money is a touchy subject for most. The topic sometimes brings out the worst in people. We become withdrawn, pushy, or manipulative.

But it doesn’t have to be that way. With the right attitude and an honest agenda, couples can effectively communicate about getting out of debt, spending and giving, investing, and all the rest.

As you consider the information on your Money Matrix from your SYMBIS Assessment Report, what troubles you most and why? Also, what do you see on this page that gives you the most optimism about how the two of you will manage your money? And what do you think this passage from the sixth chapter of Proverbs has to say about your relations when it comes to finances?

Are you reading the book Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts yet? If not, you can learn more here.