Profound Mystery: Marriage Lessons from EphesiansSample

A Husband’s Love

The plane was eerily silent as he tightened the final strap on his wife’s parachute. He knew he didn’t have much time, for their single engine Cessna was losing altitude rapidly.  All he could hear was the howl of the wind outside, creaking of metal, and his wife’s frightened breath. She was terrified. 

He placed his hands on her shoulders and gave her the same reassuring look that he had given her other times that she was scared. 

“I love you,” he whispered, and she felt herself begin to relax. He was always so calm, so steady.

“Okay. Now let me help you with your chute!” she said as he turned to open the plane door. Then, without another word, she felt his powerful hands shoving her out into the void. She would later learn they only had one parachute.

Ask any husband if he would be willing to die to save his wife and most would say yes without a second thought. This form of heroism is often seen as the ultimate expression of love. It is the stuff of songs and legends. Thankfully, few husbands will ever be faced with this type of decision. 

But we are called to love our wives as Christ loved the church (Ephesians 5:25). This type of sacrificial leadership is the flip side of wifely submission. 

When Jesus chose to sacrifice Himself for the church, His bride, he set the standard for husbands everywhere. Through His journey to the cross, He showed us how to: 

• Serve others (John 13:1-17)


• Swallow our pride (Matthew 27:27-31)


• Give up our rights (Philippians 2:6-8)


• Do something we do not want to do, for the sake of others (Luke 22:42)

This type of servant leadership isn’t easy. In many ways, dying for your wife is easier than living for her.

By nature we are selfish creatures. We work hard to safeguard our rights and we’d much rather have others serve us.

So how can a husband love his wife like Christ loved the church? Keep in mind that when Christ endured the humiliation of the cross, He had our sanctification in mind. He wanted to wash us, to make us holy and without blemish. A husband’s sacrifice for his wife needs to be similarly motivated. 

Maybe it means doing some extra house work so your wife will be rested enough to be able to read her Bible in the mornings. Maybe it means coming home early and taking care of the kids so your wife can go to a women’s group at church. Or maybe it means overlooking an insult to model a picture of God’s grace.

Without such purpose, the nobility of self-sacrifice is lost. When the betterment of his wife is the goal, a husband can more easily decide when to give in, when to stand firm, and when to give her the last parachute. 

Pray: Husband: Lord, show me how to help my wife grow more into the image of Your Son. Wife: Lord, give my husband wisdom as he takes on the responsibility of leadership. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

For more on this topic listen to, “The Sacrificial Leader” on FamilyLifeToday.com.