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Paul Performs a Spiritual Check-up with the Ephesian Leaders in Miletus – Acts 20:16-38 NKJV

If Goodbyes are Difficult, it Means You Care.

It is always good for a church and its leadership to perform spiritual check-ups. Reflecting upon what God has done, observing what He is doing, and attempting to envision what He will do provides necessary reflection, introspection, and inspiration incumbent upon any healthy church. Evaluating the past, assessing the present, and preparing for the future is a good practice for any person or organization.

It is necessary for the health of the church to do all three. But in churches and with various leaders, there is a temptation to focus more on one aspect of the ministry and not all three aspects. For example, a church that focuses too heavily on the past tends to become imbalanced and stagnate in its effectiveness to reach its current communities with the Gospel. And, if left unchecked, the precious people of this type of church will end up being more passionate about how things have always been done and run, more than being the church today. Ultimately, God will bring about a divine course correction for this type of ministry. Of course, one does not want to fully ignore the lessons from the past. As it is commonly said, “Ignore the past and you are destined to repeat it.” Similarly, a church is imbalanced if it consciously ignores the lessons from the past and attempts to focus only on today. Famous eccentric fashion designer, Edna Mode (of “The Incredibles” fame), is quoted as saying, “I never look back, darling, it distracts from the now.” To ignore the lessons from the past is as if a person enters into the middle of a five-hour meeting, believing he does not need to know all that was said and decided upon before entering the meeting. It is impossible for him to engage with the same level of understanding as the other individuals. Lastly, there are strong visionaries who enjoy focusing on the future and who can cast a future vision for a church, but the most effective vision casters are the ones who have a good handle on the past, while not being allowed to get stuck in the past. In addition, they know clearly where things currently stand. They both evaluate the church’s current state of readiness to progress in the future, but assess to what level the church can withstand being stretched in its capacity to attempt greater things for God. Therefore, a healthy relationship with the past, present, and vision casting for the future is necessary to maintain a healthy church.

Paul maintained this healthy balance and rehearsed all three aspects of the church in Ephesus with its leaders as they met in a neighboring city, Miletus. Paul was hustling to make it to Jerusalem for the Day of Pentecost, so he had to sail past Ephesus, but he requested that the Ephesian leadership be so kind as to meet him in Miletus (Acts 20:16), so he could both save time in his travels and also connect to these church leaders who were beloved to him.

While with the Ephesian church leaders, Paul was not bashful to share his heart with them. Paul’s tone was very pastoral and friendly. He did not lecture them as he had lectured to them over two years for hours a day in Ephesus, in the school of Tyrannus (Acts 19:9-10). This was a conversation of mutual affection. He was both their pastor and their friend. In talking with them, Paul reflected upon what God had done in Ephesus, he rehearsed what God was currently doing, forecasted what would come their way, and how to best prepare.

Paul summarized his unwavering commitment to them and how he ministered among them with courage and passion (20:18-21). He admitted that there were moments that brought him to tears (Acts 20:19, 31). He remembered how he ministered in such a way that he could not be blamed should anyone falsely say they never heard the Gospel preached or that it is his fault they did not believe it (26:26-27). He then reflected upon how he selflessly served them by not desiring silver or gold and how he worked with his own hands while in Ephesus (Acts 20:33-35). And while this seems like a list of Paul’s accomplishments and credentials, remember that Paul was doing a spiritual check-up to make sure they were healthy and equipped to lead in the future without him. Paul reviewed his example so they would have a good model to follow in the future. This approach parallels what Paul told the believers in Corinth when Paul wrote them while he was recently in Ephesus, “Imitate me, just as I also imitate Christ” (1 Corinthians 11:1 NKJV).

Then Paul reviewed his current situation and the current state of the church (Acts 20:22-25, 28, 32). Paul explained tenderly that it would be their final meeting (Acts 20:25). He mentioned that he was awaiting persecution upon his arrival at Jerusalem (Acts 20:22-24). He encouraged them that the church needed continual feeding and shepherding by these leaders (Acts 20:28).

And before their meeting was over, he discussed what the church in Ephe- sus would inevitably experience. Paul warned them of false teachers that would attempt to draw people away from the church (Acts 20:30b). But his warning took a little different and concerning twist. He told them to watch out because these false teachers would “from among yourselves men will rise up” (Acts 20:30a NKJV). Meaning, he warned them that the people would “rise up” from within the church who desire to draw away the Ephesian believers and persuade them to follow after them! And that it probably had already begun the moment Paul personally left, “For I know this, that after my departure savage wolves will come in among you, not sparing the flock” (Acts 20:29 NKJV). And while this unfortunately happens even in ministries today, Paul must have sensed something that concerned him about this reality all the while he was in Ephesus, not just after he left, “Therefore watch, and remember that for three years I did not cease to warn everyone night and day with tears” (Acts 20:31 NKJV)!

After three years of ministry in Ephesus, Paul felt this meeting had to take place for the health of the church. He felt it was important to review where they had been and where they currently were, in order to prepare them for courageous and prosperous ministry in the future. But it was more than a business meeting. It was more than an organizational post-mortem meeting or an after-action debrief. It served as an opportunity for a pastor who profoundly loved his people to express his deep love and affection for them. It enabled the people to see that the three years God gave them together were not just a job, but a heartfelt calling. Paul used this opportunity to express his sincere love for them.

And the most difficult part of ministering to people you love is to place them in the hands of God and to trust that the loving, all-powerful Head of the Church (Colossians 1:18) will care for them and bring them the spirit-controlled leaders they need to encourage spirituality among the church and to mature them. It is hard for a pastor to separate from precious believers. But Paul had to tell them, and they needed to hear, that he had to “commend you to God and to the word of His grace, which is able to build you up and give you an inheritance among all those who are sanctified” (Acts 20:32 NKJV).

It is therapeutic to the soul to be able to express one’s feelings of appreciation with deep, heartfelt emotion to those who hold a special place in our hearts, especially those who have positively contributed to our spiritual growth. And it is good and right for a leader to sincerely express how much s/he care for people. This moment for Paul provided all these friends with a precious opportunity. It was a bittersweet moment yet very special. “And when he had said these things, he knelt down and prayed with them all. Then they all wept freely and fell on Paul’s neck and kissed him, sorrowing most of all for the words which he spoke, that they would see his face no more. And they accompanied him to the ship” (Acts 20:37-38 NKJV).

Ponder & Pray Today…

Reflect on a time you had to say goodbye to a dear fellow believer. Think about what you appreciated most about the person. Was it someone who encouraged your spirit every time you were with him/her? Were you able to be yourself around him/her and share your honest thoughts without judgment? Did the person allow you to be human while still pointing you to Christ in their own special way? Or was it a church congregation that was extremely special to you, but you had to part ways? What do you most appreciate about that church that makes you smile even after you are away? Ponder what made this individual or believers so special to you.

Pray and thank God that He brought these people into your life for a season. Thank God for the spirit-controlled attitude and testimony they maintained around you. Thank God that they pointed you to Christ. And also thank Him for the funny and memorable times God allowed you to have that encouraged your spirit so many times. Then pray for the Lord to “bless [name] and protect [name]. May the Lord smile on [name] and be gracious to [name]. May the Lord show [name] his favor and give [name] his peace” (Numbers 6:24-26).