I'm Just a Guy: Raising a Daughter(s)Sample

Speaking Life Over Her

One thing I’ve learned on this journey of raising a daughter is this: my words carry more weight than I ever imagined.

Sure, I had glimpses of this truth in other relationships—girlfriends, and later, my wife—but fatherhood took it to an entirely new level. The words I speak to my daughter don’t just float into the air; they land deep in her heart. They shape her confidence. They build her sense of worth.

When I use words to affirm her and build her up, I see her stand taller. It becomes her foundation for strength and courage. But the opposite is also true. When my words are harsh or my tone is sharp, the effect is immediate—her shoulders slump, her eyes dim, and her voice grows quiet.

Nowhere have I seen this more clearly than on the ball field. Coaching her in softball has been one of my greatest joys, but it’s also where this lesson hits home. Every season is a blessing because I get a front-row seat to watch her grow—not just as a player, but as a young woman. And through it all, I know she’s always looking to me for affirmation.

Here’s the hard part: when does the coach stop and dad begin? With the other players, it’s easy—I’m always the coach. But with her, that line is razor thin.

I’ll never forget one game where things didn’t go her way. In full coach mode, I started offering feedback, just like I would to any player. But what she heard was criticism—and it hurt. Tension rose quickly. I had to pull her aside, step out of coach mode, and look her in the eyes as Dad. I reminded her that before anything else, she’s my daughter—and that will always come first.

That moment was a gut check. My words weren’t wrong, but my timing and tone were. And that made all the difference.

Proverbs remind us that our words hold the power of life and death. For daughters, that truth feels magnified. Every word we speak can breathe life into their hearts—or crush their spirit. So let’s make it our goal to be men who speak life, in every season, on and off the field.

Reflection Questions:

1. How do your words affect your daughter’s confidence?
2. How can you affirm her after a tough day or failure?