The Eruption Within: A Biblical Plan for Managing AngerSample

Day 2: The Behavior That Led to Anger

Scripture Reading: James 1:19-20, Proverbs 16-17

Recognizing the Patterns

Yesterday, we looked at the outcome of our anger and the destruction it can leave behind. Today, we take a step back and examine the behaviors that lead to those outcomes.

Let’s return to our driving scenario. When another car cuts you off, what happens to your body? Your muscles tense, your hands grip the steering wheel, your jaw clenches, and your heart pounds. Your body prepares for action, triggering the well-known fight, flight, or freeze response. Without thinking, you slam your hand on the horn, yell in frustration, or speed up to get back at the other driver.

Anger isn’t just an emotional reaction; it’s a physiological and behavioral response. If we can identify our angry behaviors before they escalate, we can interrupt the cycle before it leads to regret.

James 1:19-20 gives us a simple but powerful directive:
“My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.”

The way we express anger matters. Our behaviors determine whether we handle anger in a way that honors God or in a way that leads to destruction.

What Does Your Anger Look Like?

Take a moment to think about what you do when you’re angry. How does your body react? What do you say? How do you behave?

For some, anger is loud and explosive, as shown by yelling, slamming doors, or hitting objects. For others, anger is quiet but just as destructive through silent treatment, passive-aggressive comments, or withdrawal from loved ones. Proverbs 16:32 reminds us, “Better a patient person than a warrior, one with self-control than one who takes a city.” The problem isn’t anger itself—it’s what we do with it.

When we become aware of our anger patterns, we can disrupt them before they lead to sin.

Interrupting the Cycle

Let’s go back to the driving example. Imagine that instead of gripping the wheel tightly and reacting instinctively, you took a different approach:

1. The moment you feel anger rising, place your hands below the steering wheel.
2. Take five deep breaths, inhaling through your nose for four seconds and exhaling for six.
3. Before saying or doing anything, mentally ask yourself, What’s the best next step?

This slight shift disrupts the natural anger response and forces you to slow down. It gives you time to choose a better reaction, one that won’t lead to regret.

The same principle applies to every situation. If you clench your fists when angry, try opening your hands. If you usually raise your voice, try lowering it. If you storm out of a room, try staying and taking a breath before responding. Interrupting the behavior gives you control over the outcome.

Proverbs 17:27 says, “The one who has knowledge uses words with restraint, and whoever has understanding is even-tempered.” The more we train ourselves to recognize and change our anger behaviors, the more we align with the wisdom of God.

Your Anger Volcano

If we don’t interrupt our behaviors, the lava builds to an eruption. Cleaning up the mess afterward is exhausting, but if we learn to redirect the flow by changing our behaviors, we prevent the massive eruption in the first place. The lava in your anger is still destructive, and we’ll address that in the upcoming days. However, today is about learning to manage the behaviors so that they don’t produce a massive eruption.

Reflection Question:

What do you physically do when you get angry? What is one behavior you can change to slow down your response?

Prayer Prompt:

Ask God to make you aware of your anger behaviors. Pray for wisdom to slow down, self-control to change your reactions, and patience to handle frustrating situations in a way that honors Him.