Freedom Renewed: Healing From Addiction Through Grace and GrowthSample

Day 3: The Truest Version of You

We all create identities to help us feel safe and secure in an uncertain world. Your identity is a construct of yourself that you generated when you were younger to establish stability and a sense of self. For some, identity serves mostly as a protective mechanism for feeling safe in an unpredictable life situation. Hypersexuality might have been infused into your identity at an early age due to your porn use. Porn and masturbation are a coping strategy related to low ability to deal with emotions. Learning to increase your emotional maturity can improve your sex life and relationship satisfaction. When you learn to deal with life’s challenges in different, healthier ways instead of porn, then you can also learn how to truly enjoy sexual experiences with your partner from a standpoint of well-being.

The Real You was preprogrammed, before porn use, for the purposes you were uniquely designed for.

That is why the true self is thought of by many people as a spiritual entity—because it is not programmed by the features and functions of the world, but rather it is the innate and divinely inspired programming you were born with. This self feels first and then responds intentionally based on purpose. This version of you can enjoy vulnerable, erotic sex with your partner, feeling free to connect in a loving, intimate way.

Yet shame, although strongly associated with porn use, can also arise from your upbringing, specifically surrounding sexuality. If your parents never talked with you about healthy sexuality and it was considered a taboo subject even into adulthood, you may feel an inherent sexual shame. Sexual shame can also arise from your self-programming in response to the environment you lived in as a child.

But if you take a new action while navigating through life, then you can learn to think about the world differently and walk within it with new hope, behaviors, and confidence. Your new navigation pattern can help you create the life you want.

Identity is pliable: you can change it to be the truest version of yourself.

Response: How has your understanding of your identity been shaped by past experiences and behaviors, including your use of pornography? Reflecting on Ephesians 2:10, John 1:12, and Romans 12:2, how might stepping into the identity God has uniquely designed for you bring freedom and transformation in your relationships, sexuality, and emotional well-being? What steps can you take today to align yourself with the truest, divinely inspired version of you?

Prayer: Father, please help me identify the “me” I have become that represents a false persona. Leading me toward the “me” you created, show me what’s holding me back, so I can make room for the Real Me who walks in freedom from porn.