MOBILITY: A WILLING HEART

I don’t deserve all that I have.

At this moment, I’m sitting in my spacious and comfortable home—a home filled with handpicked “treasures” from various countries. I hear birds of all sorts chirping, cheeping, and chattering in the distance. A wind chime rings with a gentle melody as a light cool breeze touches my cheeks. Our garden, lush and lovely, is home to all sorts of creatures—butterflies and dragonflies being my favorites.

You might think I live in some earthly version of heaven. That isn’t far from the truth. I’m writing in Nairobi, Kenya, where my husband and I (along with our daughter) live and work. In all honesty, much of Nairobi is far from paradise, but that’s not the point.

Despite my beautiful surroundings, my heart was seldom at peace for over twelve years. I couldn’t quite wrap my head around the idea that I was a missionary. I wrestled with God. How did I get here? Did life just “happen” to me? I didn’t necessarily want to be a missionary. No burden or desire from childhood. No “call” during a powerful missions service. I was not raised in a missions-minded family. I didn’t fit the mold.

As a high-school and university student, I wasn’t interested in a white-picket-fence life, either. I longed for a “different” life filled with travel and fascinating experiences. I just wasn’t planning on a life spent in Africa.

I was internally conflicted. I wanted my way because I believed my plans would bring me great satisfaction. On the other hand, I longed for my Creator’s influence and guidance because, at a more soulful level, I knew this is where life is well lived. I continually looked for signs to fight my will, begging God to keep my heart pure and clear and asking for clarity regarding the future.

When I was 25, Africa was the answer. At 37, the answer hadn’t changed. After 12 years, I couldn’t seem to get rid of Africa. God kept taking my family and me back to this land. At 25, I fought hard, kicked hard, cried hard, and journeyed in much of my strength, and after years of hearing the same answer, I grew weary.

During a trip to the States, I found myself fighting this battle yet again. Exhausted beyond words, in desperation, I met with a woman who had at one time been a missionary struggling with similar issues. And there, my entire life perspective shifted. After numerous trips back and forth across the ocean, this one marked a different kind of journey. I still fought a little, kicked a little, and cried a little but felt carried in strength far superior to my own.

Settling back into our home in Nairobi, I see with new eyes. The more I rest in this strength, the more my loving Creator fulfills the truest and deepest longings of my soul. The truth is, in many ways, I’m growing to love living here. We have productive, fulfilling, and purposeful work. We’ve got an incredible support system and priceless friends. We live well in Africa. After years of wrestling, my God continues to provide beautifully for us.

So here I am. Years later. Would I have liked to live the version of my life I thought I wanted? Possibly. But I’ve let that go. I’ve traded my plans, my dreams, and my aspirations. In trading, I’ve learned to trust. With surrender, goodness deeper than I thought possible has followed. The revised version of my life is much richer, sweeter, and more satisfying than the original version. I’m grateful.

My heart has ceased to be willful. My heart has become willing.

LIVE DEAD CHALLENGE

The gospel is mobile, as there are so many places and people that have not yet heard about Jesus. Is it possible that Jesus is calling you to leave all that is comfortable, all that you think completes you, to take the gospel where it has not yet reached? Today, spend 15 minutes researching Somalia, Sudan, Comoros, Eritrea, or Djibouti. Ask yourself, “If God asked me to move there to work with an unreached people, would my heart be willing?”

UNREACHED PEOPLE GROUP: DATOOG

Deep in the remote northern valley of Eyasi, Tanzania, lives the Datoog tribe. The ladies wear beautiful jewelry made of brass and beads, while the men have traditional scarring to emphasize their beauty. As you go through your day, say a prayer every time you notice an unusual piece of jewelry or a tattoo. The Datoog live completely isolated from the gospel and desperately need a witness.