Scripture: “Then God’s wonderful peace that transcends human understanding, will guard your heart and mind through Jesus Christ.” (Philippians 4:7, TPT)
Song of the day: “Peace (Live)”
Three years ago, I truly found peace. What’s funny is the genesis of my peace started in chaos. For so long I believed peace was one of two things. First, I believed peace was the product of a perfect equation.
Good relationships + financial security + success = peace
I was in this never-ending cycle of trying to “crack the code” to a “perfect peace” that doesn’t exist.
Second, I thought peace was a reward for good work. I was always told to “follow peace” like it was this prize dangling in front of me like a carrot. I desperately needed peace, but I felt like I didn’t deserve it. How could I have the audacity to ask God for peace when my own decisions had thrown me into the eye of a chaotic storm?
There I was, trapped in a cage of my own making, but pretending everything was fine. The kicker was, I wasn’t fine.
One Tuesday night in February, I had a mental breakdown. I had experienced panic attacks before, but nothing this bad. I went back to my hometown of St. Louis, Missouri (Go Cards!) and stayed at my parents’ house, which felt like rock-bottom. I began seeing a counselor who helped me understand my thoughts and control my breathing. I learned how to truly meditate in the presence of God. During this season, the Lord gave me the song that would become the title track to my entire record, PEACE.
It was at the end of myself that I met Jesus in a whole new way. I met Him as the Prince of Peace. He took me through a slideshow of my life and made Himself known in every moment. In moments I thought I was truly, completely alone, He was there. That’s when I realized, peace is not a prize, it’s a person.
My encouragement for you today: Peace is available for you right now. Peace is not the product of a perfect equation. Peace is not a reward for good work. Peace is a man named Jesus. You don’t have to hold it all together. You are grounded in peace.