Family ID: 7 Keys To A Great FamilySample

4: Teach During Non-Conflict Times

Gary Ezzo, the author of Growing Kids God’s Way, wrote: “Moral truth is best communicated in periods of non-conflict. That doesn’t mean we will not teach at times of correction, but it does mean a healthy dose of moral enlightenment should take place throughout the day and in the moments of non-conflict, when the child is not in a position to have to defend his or her actions.”

To add to that, when you see your child do something right — say, gracefully receiving “no” for an answer, or being spontaneously generous, or treating someone kindly, or pleasantly sharing with someone else — highlight that good behavior. Make sure they know that you noticed. Reward them with affirmation. Positive behavior is a big deal, and you should celebrate it together!

Help your kids learn to plan good behavior ahead of time. When you know you’re going to be going out somewhere, remind your kids of specific times when you’ve seen them behave well in the past. Then express your clear expectations for what behavior will be appropriate for wherever it is that you’re going.

“Dads, communicate encouraging words to your children. If you don’t, they’ll internalize your silence as rejection.” —Greg C. Gunn