Seasons Of Divorce Volume 1: Seasons Of Loss And Sorrow

Day 4 of 7 • This day’s reading

I was at the computer one day. My Siamese cat was sleeping on the bed. After sitting there a few moments, the cat got up and jumped into my lap, expecting me to pet him. I obliged a few moments, then turned back to writing. The cat was not impressed (they never really are, you know). The cat turned and rubbed his head against my chest, and nestled up closely insisting that I wasn’t done scratching his fur until he decided I was done. Of course, as the obedient house guest I am, I stroked his fur until he was content to go back to his domain, part of which he allowed me to occupy a bit longer. I was struck by something about cats that divorcing people can benefit from emulating.

My cat had the courage to come express his need for caring, and did not give up until his need was met. Sometimes when we are struggling in divorce, we need to have the courage to express that we are in need of something, to just ask for help. Or for love. Or whatever assistance we need. Even Paul asked for help! I remember a friend who realized in the middle of the day that she hadn’t fed her toddlers, and yet didn’t feel she had the strength to do so. She called a family member and asked if that person would mind coming over and making something for the toddlers to eat. Sometimes those who care for us want to help and be supportive, but don’t know exactly how. A request like that gives them the opportunity to express concern in appropriate ways. Sometimes it may be simply telling a good friend, “You know, I could sure use a hug today.”

A friend of mine once said: “If you believe that it is more blessed to give than receive, then if you don’t let me give of myself, you are robbing me of a blessing!!” So don’t let those who care for YOU get cheated out of a blessing, just because you are hesitant (or maybe too proud) to ask for help.