There are three words that make religion quake.
Three words that the enemy would like to tell you are words of doubt, but I believe they are words of faith.
Three words he’d like you to believe show weakness and foolishness, but I believe they show strength and godly wisdom.
Three words that sound like heresy to religious people, but sound like refreshing honesty to people searching for answers.
Here are the three words and the title of today’s message - I Don’t Know.

Here’s the picture I think those verses paint - As followers of Jesus, you will constantly be in pursuit of Him, you will love Him,
you will need Him, you will believe in Him,
you will trust Him, you will praise Him,
you will worship Him, but you will never fully understand Him.

Why?

Because the things of eternity can’t be contained in the things of earth. That’s why God’s ultimate display of power was squeezing the fullness of God into human form for 33 years. Paul told the people in Ephesians 3 - I pray you have the power to understand the love of God. And then in the next verse he says, but the love of God is too great for anyone to understand.

Why pray for what he admits can never happen?

Because it’s in the pursuit of those eternal things that we continue to draw closer to Him.
It’s in the pursuit that we continue to experience more of Him.
It’s in the pursuit that we begin to become more and more like Him.
It’s in the pursuit of Him that the mirror of our lives begins to reflect His light more clearly.
It’s in the pursuit of Him that we come to know Him, BUT we will never fully understand Him because His ways are higher than ours. His thoughts are higher than ours.
As far away as the heavens are from the earth, that’s how far away we are from being able to understand God.
So if you are being honest, and you are being humble, then you better get really comfortable using those three words - I don’t know.

You say, John, I get that we won’t always know, but what does that have to do with faith?

Because religion is always about accumulating knowledge.
Gotta learn the rules.
Gotta know everything there is to know.
Gotta be able to look smart.
Gotta be able to act like you’ve got it all together and you understand everything.
Gotta look like you’ve got your god under control and that you’ve learned how to make him do your bidding.

Ladies and gentlemen, that isn’t just religion, that’s witchcraft.
Don’t make promises for God that He didn’t make for Himself.
Don’t speak for Him if He didn’t say it.
Don’t tell somebody you’re gonna get God to do some particular thing. That’s manipulation for your own benefit in an attempt to seem more powerful than you are.
The reality is we serve a God whose thoughts and ways are impossible for us to even understand, much less predict. Stop trying to act like you understand everything and you control everything. You’re harming people in the name of Jesus.

2 Corinthians says we are Christ’s ambassadors. As ambassadors, we convey the decisions and positions of our King. Sometimes we explain them, sometimes we just convey them.
We aren’t His attorney, He’s OUR attorney.
We aren’t His defender, He’s OUR defender.
When He has given explanation in the Word, we can feel free to offer it, but sometimes, if we are honest, we are going to have to say - I Don’t Know. And to do more than that does more harm than good.

Given the obscene amount of religion that I’ve swallowed my whole life, I have struggled mightily through many things, especially as a pastor. I’m gonna tell you about a couple of them and I hope you can connect them to things in your life. A few years ago, we had 6 people in our congregation who had cancer, all at the same time. Only 3 survived. In the midst of that, as it became apparent that they were losing the fight, I had a bit of a crisis of faith.

Why was our congregation hit like this? Was it a spiritual attack?
Was it a spirit of infirmity? Was there sin in the camp?
Why couldn’t I lead them out of it?
Why weren’t my prayers being effective?
Why were people I loved dying?
Why were some of them doing well and others not?
Why did some live and others die?
How do I keep believing in and preaching about divine healing when I can’t seem to make sense of how it happens?

There was a great deal of pressure that I was feeling about the whole thing. Trying to keep their faith up when I was struggling with my own. Trying to give them hope when all the signs were to the contrary. Trying to have a practical application of the theology of healing. I reached out to my mentor-from-afar, Dr. Rutland, and was able to talk to his assistant, who is himself a Spirit-filled pastor. He said some helpful things, some comforting things, but at the end of the day, I was faced with those terrifying three words as the answer to most of my questions - I don’t know.

A couple of years ago, I faced my harshest criticism and it absolutely shook me to my core. I have not spoken of it in public because I wanted to make sure I had forgiven the person and had a clean conscience toward the situation. I’ve mentioned many times that I get really intimidated about praying in public. There are so many expectations, many rooted in religion, some from other people, but many of them from within myself. It’s just hard for me. I was asked to pray about a situation in which someone was critically ill. We prayed over them in the service, which meant I prayed on behalf of the congregation. I thought I did pretty good. I could picture the judges' table in my mind and they all agreed it was a solid 7.3. It’s ridiculous, I know. But there seemed to be a unity in the room. I sensed the Spirit had born witness with it.

At 7:33 the next morning, I got a text message from someone who said when we prayed as a congregation for someone’s healing, it seemed to him that OUR doubts negated OUR faith. He did say he wasn’t trying to be critical and I believe him, but there it was. Perhaps I was being overly sensitive, but since I’m the one with the microphone, it was pretty clear whose faith was in question. Later that day, the person we had prayed for passed away. It took my breath. Immediately, the enemy connected those dots for me - if only I had prayed better, if only I had more faith, if only I was more, better, stronger, deeper, more this, more that, more something - then that person would’ve been healed. My mind was swirling. I couldn’t pray. I wasn’t sure I even knew how.

The next week, we lost Kylie, Robby and Erica’s 22-year-old daughter. I stood there in the hospital waiting room as that awful day unfolded, with dozens of people around me needing faith and leadership and hope, most of all Robby and Erica - my best friends in the world. I stood there with them, needing strength and Kylie needing a miracle, and I was paralyzed. It was everyone’s worst nightmare and I felt more helpless and useless and faithless than I had ever felt. All I could hear in my mind was the voice of the person who had sent that text. So I walked outside and got really honest with God that day. I said, “Father, I apparently don’t even know how to do this, but that girl in there needs you. She needs a miracle. Lord, I believe, but help me with my unbelief. You know my heart. Pull out of my heart whatever it is you need to see or hear that communicates my faith and my desperation.”

In all honesty, I could still hear the comforting and reassuring voice of the Spirit in the midst of all of it. I knew what was swirling around in my head were lies and doubts, but they came in such an avalanche, and that religious stuff was so deeply embedded, that I couldn’t take them captive fast enough to bring them under subjection.

John, what part did religion play?
I know that Jesus promised never to leave us or forsake us and my spirit bore witness to the fact that He was still right beside me, but it was that stinking religion that told me I had violated the rules somehow, that I was unqualified somehow, and that even though He was near, I didn’t have access to Him.

In the moment of my most desperate need, religion built a fake wall between me and my Father, and I fell for it hook, line, and sinker. Hear me today. Don’t fall for it. His love keeps Him near. His grace keeps Him accessible. If the Jewish father welcomed a son who smelled of alcohol, mud, and pig slop, then there is nothing you can do that will keep Him away from you. No wall He won’t kick down, lie He won’t tear down, coming after you.

I don’t know if it would have changed the outcome that day, but I wouldn’t have had to walk through it alone.

Why did we lose Kylie? I don’t know.
Why did that person we prayed for with such passion pass away? I don’t know.
Why did all those folks get cancer? Why did half of them pass away?
I don’t know.

I had three friends with COVID. I and a whole lot of other people prayed for all three. One was miraculously healed, one passed away, and the other is still living with the effects.
Why?
I don’t know.

Why do kids get abused?
Why do women and children get trafficked?
Why do good people lose everything they have through no fault of their own?
Why can some people have kids and others can’t?

I don’t know!

And listen, I’ve got a ton more questions. I bet you do too. I’ve even got questions from the Bible.

This is the Apostle Paul's associate!

Why wasn't he healed?

Are you telling me after all they had seen and done, that Paul and his associate didn’t have the faith for him to be healed? That makes zero sense.

Jesus went to the pool of Bethesda, with dozens if not hundreds of sick people, and only healed 1 person.

What’s up with that?

Listen to me - I don’t know.

Look at Hebrews 11. It’s the hall of fame of faith. All these incredible heroes are mentioned. Abraham, Sarah, Moses, Rahab, Abel, Enoch. Then it says this -

Why were some of them victorious and others suffered horribly?

I don’t know.

Why was Peter crucified upside down, all the other apostles were martyred, but John was delivered from boiling oil and died an old man?

I don’t know! But look at what Jesus said about that very question -

Guess what?

Jesus didn’t answer the question. Because at the end of the day, God doesn’t have to explain himself to us. The Father doesn’t have to explain Himself to the kids. The Potter doesn’t have to ask permission of the clay. The King doesn’t take a vote of His constituents. Sometimes we have to remind ourselves that there will be things that God says and does that we will not be able to understand. We won’t be able to justify them. We won’t be able to explain them. We won’t be able to wrap our heads around them. Sometimes, only God knows and He ain’t telling.

So John, if we don’t know all this stuff, what DO we know?

We know He is God.
We know He is good.
We know He is just.
We know He is love.
We know He sees us, knows us, hears us, and cares about us.

Sometimes, that has to be enough. The best you can hope to do is trust Him, follow Him, and have faith in Him. We are not in a partnership of equals. He is God. Period. Your efforts to understand everything will only frustrate you. Your efforts to explain will only confuse others. Your attempts at justifying something He has not revealed will poison God’s character and nature. That’s how we got in this mess in the first place. The serpent questioned God’s motives and instead of Eve saying - I don’t know, but I trust God - she listened to the serpent’s conspiracy theory and ruined everything for everyone! Sometimes the best course of action is to say those three powerful, honest words - I don’t know.

The older I get, the less patience I have with people who say they have all the answers. I used to be really sure of almost everything I believed. Now, I am more and more sure of less and less things. The things I know without a doubt are very few, but they are deeper than ever. There’s a lot more gray areas in my world now.
I’ve walked through a lot myself and I’ve walked with a lot of other people through a lot of things.

Why can’t we accept the fact that God said we wouldn’t understand everything?
Why can’t we be honest with people and give them a sincere, honest, heartfelt, emotionally connected I Don’t Know?

There’s something comforting and reassuring about having people around you who understand the depth of the pain or the seriousness of the situation, but who love you enough not to give you a shallow, flippant, arrogant, religious answer. Those little Christianese, one-liner, coffee cup Christianity things that church folks say is SO disrespectful and SO offensive to, you know, normal people.

Job’s friends were doing great while they were sitting in silent solidarity with their friend. When they opened their mouths, trying to explain an inexplicable situation, that’s when things went south. When things don’t turn out like we think they should have, resist the urge to fill in the blanks.

Oh, you didn’t have enough, faith.
Oh you didn’t ask in the right way.
Oh you should’ve fasted 2 more days.
The problem is, we’re down here moving our little religious checker pieces around and God is playing five-level, three-dimensional chess. It’s not even the same game!
We are down here, adding and subtracting on our fingers and toes and He’s using a cosmic calculus that we didn’t even know existed.

Can we drop the mask of religion for just a second and admit that there are some things more complicated than we wish they were?

This is a faith walk. If you could figure everything out and connect all the dots, it wouldn’t require faith.

John, aren’t you hesitant to put your faith in a God you can’t fully understand?

No, as a matter of fact, it gives me great comfort. Here’s why -
I refuse to follow a god I can completely understand. If I could understand him, I could be him.
I refuse to follow a god who does exactly what I want Him to do, when I want Him to do it. That means he’s following me, not me following him.
I refuse to follow a god I have created in my own image. That’s backwards.
But I have found a God Whose ways and thoughts are higher, whose power is unmatched, and whose promises are immovable. It’s far better for me to place my faith in Him, even when I don’t understand, than to rely on myself and my own power and wisdom.

Let me ask you -
What are you going through right now that has you baffled?
How much time, how much emotional and spiritual energy have we wasted trying to figure out why something is happening?

We’ve blamed stuff on the devil that was Godly discipline, and we’ve blamed stuff on God that He had nothing to do with. Either way, we’d have been better served to surrender the explanation of the circumstances to God and focus on surviving and thriving through it. Instead of -
“God, why is this happening and when will it end?
How about -
God what are you teaching me in this?
How can you use this to Your glory?
Instead of -
Why me?
How about -
What now?
Yes, repent.
Yes, resist the devil.
We should live a life of repentance and devil-resisting anyway.
Yes, pray.
Yes, keep the faith.
Yes, trust and believe.
But when you’re staying awake at night trying to decipher the sources of your circumstances, you’re usually wasting your time. And you need the extra sleep in a storm!

It’s often a vicious cycle. It’s a kind of mud that keeps you stuck. I’m not saying surrender TO the circumstance, I’m saying surrender IN the circumstance. Ask Him to guide you, teach you, show you, save you, rescue you, mold you, shape you, equip you - whatever it is He’s doing, surrender to it so He can do it! Ask Him to show you if it’s an attack of the enemy and how to stand against it, but until then, stop straining yourself on the big picture and get really short-sighted. Focus on what’s in front of you. Ok God, what’s today look like? Give me this day my daily bread. I just want you to know, you CAN withstand what you don’t understand.

How many prayers has God answered for us?
How many times has He given us what we’ve asked for?

Like a nursing baby, He has provided for us over and over. But there comes a time when He doesn’t give us what we want. The question David asks is - are we content to sit in His presence even when we didn’t get the provision we wanted? He’s saying, there are some things that are too high for us to understand and too complicated for us to process. That baby wouldn’t understand the weaning process even if God explained it. Some things are unknown, but others are unknowable.

What if God’s silence is not His cruelty but His kindness?

It does us no good for God to give us an answer that we aren’t capable of understanding anyway.

It is an exercise of faith to say as Job did - though He slay me, yet will I trust Him.

It is an exercise of faith to say as the Hebrew boys did - I know God is able to deliver us, but even if He doesn’t, we’re not turning our backs on Him.

It is an exercise of faith and evidence of maturity to say -
I don’t like what’s happening. I don’t understand it.
I want it to end as soon as possible.
I don’t know why it’s going on, but God, I’m gonna trust You through it.
I’m gonna praise you through it.
I’m gonna serve you through it.
I’m gonna help somebody else along the way.
I’m still gonna believe for my healing.
I’m still gonna believe the breakthrough is coming.
I’m still gonna believe for my victory.
I’m still gonna pray, but I’m not gonna obsess.
I’m still gonna pray but I’m not gonna let religion hold me hostage.
I’m gonna quit wasting my time trying to figure everything out.
I’m gonna quit resisting a closer relationship with God just because I can’t understand everything. He is the One True God. He is the One who made me. The One who knows me. The One who sees me. The One who knows the depth of my pain and the only Source of healing for it.

So God, I don’t know. I don’t have to know. I still love and trust You.