Have you ever felt like you needed to bounce back in life?

This spring and summer, we played a lot of softball. And one thing I found myself constantly saying to our team was: “Hey, it was just one play—hold your head up, shake it off, and bounce back.” Just like in sports, life gives us chances to bounce back after we mess up. But many of us stay stuck in failure instead of moving forward.

In 2017, I was part of a church plant and carried a lot of responsibility. Over time, I started seeing things in leadership that troubled me. Eventually, someone I deeply respected turned on me. After all the time and sacrifice I gave, I felt betrayed. I was left broken, weary, and confused. In that moment, I had a decision to make:

“Am I going to let the hurt define my future, or trust God and keep moving?”

We have all been hurt or betrayed. At a certain point, we have to ask the question, “Am I going to bounce back from this?”

“She’s the one that hurt me.” “He is the one that accused me.” “They never loved me the way I needed to be loved.”

We feel betrayed. That betrayal leads to resentment, and the resentment to unforgiveness. Now we are just stuck in the rut of unforgiveness. Or maybe you are the perpetrator. And now you are stuck with the guilt, shame, and unforgiveness towards yourself. This is where we can get stuck in life. And then when temptation comes we repeat the cycle.

We are all going to face the temptation of sin. Temptation in an of its self is not a sin. Temptation is universal. James 1:14-15 talks about this:

James 1:14-15
14 But each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. 15 Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death.

What is amazing about this though is that we have a savior that understands us!

Hebrews 4:15
“For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin.”

Christ understands the temptation that we are facing. And he gives us a way out. Thats why 1st Corinthians 10:13 is one of my favorite verses. Paul makes it clear that as temptation is knocking, God provides a way out. And not only that God makes sure that the temptation isn’t beyond what we can bear. We say this all the time but remember, the enemy isn’t looking for an open door, he is looking for an unlocked one.

Why do we fall then? Romans talks about this, we are all sinners, and all have fallen short of His glory. We are all going to have moments where we are going to have to bounce back from sin, failure, and missteps. And thankfully all of that has already been paid for by God through the sacrifice of Jesus on the cross.

In everything we do it boils down to picking our pain. We can either pick the pain of withstanding temptation or pick the pain of dealing with the consequence of the sin. But either way we are going to have to deal with some sort of pain. The point of the message today is to help you deal with the pain that comes with the fall and help you be able to bounce back in a christ centered way.

We have all either sinned against or have been sinned against. We all need forgiveness or have to give forgiveness. It is a part of the human experience. And the majority of your bounce back lies within your ability to give and receive forgiveness. But before we can really dive into forgiveness we need to talk about a phrase that I hear a lot in meetings that I have with people.

“I feel…”

1. Your feelings aren’t facts.

The “I Feel..” phrase could be the very thing that is causing you to stay in a pattern of apathy in life right now. We need to know that everything we are experiencing God has provided a promise or principle for us to be able to work through it and over come. That doesn’t mean that in some scenarios our feelings aren’t justified but those feelings can’t be what is driving our decisions in the matter.

We have to remember that our feelings can’t drive our faith. Our feelings can lead us astray, especially when driven by fear, shame, anger, or pride. While emotions are part of being human, they shouldn’t be the steering wheel of our lives.

Proverbs 3:5-6
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”

Instead of depending on our shifting feelings, God calls us to lean into His wisdom and direction. Even Jesus expressed deep emotion, but He chose obedience over feelings. This shows us it's not wrong to feel deeply, it’s just not wise to let emotions make the final call.

We see this with Jesus in the garden. Ultimately the submission to God’s will is what was more important. And that is what He walked out. Faith means trusting what God says even when your feelings scream otherwise. Maturity in Christ often looks like moving forward in obedience when your emotions don't feel like it.

Psalm 42:11Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation and my God.

2 Corinthians 10:5
“Take every thought captive to make it obedient to Christ.”

The psalmist talks to his feelings and redirects them to truth. That’s a biblical model for emotional maturity. Feelings are indicators, not dictators.

They tell you something is happening, but they don’t always tell you what’s true. Let God’s truth be the filteryou run your emotions through.It’s okay to feel, but we need to follow faith over feelings.

What ever you are feeling, God has spoken to it. This week as I was working out this sermon, I really felt that this particular area is where a lot of people are struggling and so I put together a 7 day devotional on feelings vs. truth. If that is a resource you would like you can get it here:freedomdl.com/feelings or you can scan the QR code.

If we allow our feelings to dictate our actions rather than allowing God to filter our feelings through His truth then we will never get to a point to where we can stand up dust ourselves off and move forward. Thats what bouncing back is about. It’s our ability to stumble in our walk with christ but have the assurance that He is still with us and for us no matter how massive the mess up is.

How can we effectively bounce back in life? We understand our feelings aren’t facts, but we have to understand forgiveness.

2. We have to understand Forgiveness
Do you understand the forgiveness that God has for you?

Forgiveness has two phases in our lives, the forgiveness we receive from God and the forgiveness that we show others.

I think that this is the hold up with a lot of us. We have the knowledge of what forgiveness is but we wrestle with the condemnation and guilt of the sin. Jesus took our place on the cross, not just to forgive our past, but to secure our future. He bore the penalty we deserved so we could walk in the freedom He earned.

Romans 6:20-23
20 For when you were slaves of sin, you were free in regard to righteousness. 21 But what fruit were you getting at that time from the things of which you are now ashamed? For the end of those things is death. 22 But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves of God, the fruit you get leads to sanctification and its end, eternal life. 23 For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

This is God’s free gift to all of us. Eternal life. How do we get there?

We understand that there is nothing that we can do about our sin in our own strength. And due to that God sent his son as a sacrifice for our sins that those who believe in him will have everlasting life. PERIOD.

We have to repent of our sins. Forgiveness is free, but turning from sin is part of embracing it. That’s what repentance is: not perfection, but redirection. All you have to do in order to experience his forgiveness, according to Romans 10:9, is confess he is lord and believe he was raised from the dead. It’s that simple. And then from that moment on we are simply following God and working out our salvation. This is why it is important to get in the process of filtering our feelings through the truth of God rather than letting our feelings dictate our life.

I said it earlier but let me say it again: Feelings are indicators, not dictators.
The moment that we put more value on not feeling forgiven rather than understand the truth, which is that we have nothing to do with our forgiveness in the first place, we have allowed ourselves to fall into the trap of the enemy which wants to take the forgiveness Jesus already won from you.

We have to understand 3 key concepts of forgiveness:
- God's Forgiveness is Complete: When God forgives, He wipes the slate clean.
- God’s Forgiveness Is Freely Given: We don’t earn it, it’s a gift through Jesus. All we have to do is confess and believe.
- God’s Forgiveness Brings Freedom: Forgiveness isn’t just about being “not guilty”, it restores our relationship with God and sets us free from shame.

This where I have found a lot of believers can get stuck. We are so use to having to do something to earn what we have that we wrestle with the gift of forgiveness.

We are only wrestling with the gift of forgiveness because we are going to have to forgive ourselves in the process. It’s hard for us to fully embrace forgiveness because we feel that we have to pay a price for our mistake, but thats the thing, the price has already be paid. I have found that the most common reason people don’t want to embrace forgiveness is because the condemnation justifies the feelings they have about themselves.

Romans 8:1
“There is no condemnation for those that are in Christ Jesus.”
When we begin to believe this, we begin to walk in the freedom of forgiveness. There is nothing that you have done that is too big for God’s grace! You are fully forgiven. We have to understand this is the forgiveness that we stand on. This is where our bounce back starts.

When we can understand this, it is easier to fulfill the greatest commandments: Love God with everything, love people with everything.

What about showing forgiveness to others? This is why forgiveness starts with us. Before we show forgiveness we have to receive it and understand it.

Forgiveness outwardly towards others starts with forgiveness inwardly towards ourselves.

You can’t give what you haven’t received. I have been in several situations in my life where someone has sinned against me but I have also been in several situation where I sinned against someone. And in the situation where I messed up, I am quick to want forgiveness. But in the situation where I am sinned against, am I quick to give it?

Earlier I was talking about the church plant I was a part of. During that time I treated people pretty poorly. Now, you can chalk it up to the culture, immaturity, and a variety of other excuses but that doesn’t change the hurt and the pain that I caused in others. And that pain and hurt led some of those people down a path to where they don’t want to be involved with church because of it.

I may have a story of how someone hurt me, but someone has a story of how I hurt them.

Going through Freedom class one of the things that I realized, is that I had a poor understand of God’s forgiveness towards me, which led me to have poor forgiveness towards others, including myself.

As I went through a process of healing, I got to the other side and there were a few opportunities for me to have conversations and make things right with people. And by no means were those conversations fun, but it allowed others to find healing. I needed to heal first from the unforgiveness towards myself. I had to experience God’s forgiveness first. Then I was able to be a conduit for healing and forgiveness to others.

And so maybe you are a perpetrator of a sin against a brother or sister in christ, let me pose a question to you: What if the thing standing between that person and their healing, is you taking accountability for your actions?

God’s forgiveness to us is free but that doesn’t mean that we skirt the responsibility of how our actions hurt others. While christ has already forgiven us, there needed to be an opportunity for restoration. Restoration only comes through us taking responsibility for the things we have done. That doesn’t mean living in guilt and condemnation. We need to take accountability.

Our condemnation shouldn’t be the consequence, your accountability should be. Forgiveness releases the offense, but accountability deals with the impact and growth of the offense.

Just because we feel guilty or upset about a situation doesn’t mean that we will change. Condemnation isn’t an adequate consequence because it doesn’t produce change. Accountability on the other hand forces us to deal with the issue at hand. Accountability leads to trust again. Forgiveness should be free but trust is earned.

Forgiveness = Letting go of the offense; releasing the right to get even.
Trust = Confidence in someone's character based on proven change.

Because we understand the power of forgiveness first hand we freely give it to others. Don’t forget that forgiveness isn’t based upon the other persons actions, it’s based on God’s mercy towards you. It’s allowing God to handle the justice of the matter rather than you taking it into your own hands.

How do we know that we are actually showing forgiveness? I believe there are a few practical ways to walk out forgiveness:

Letting Go of Retaliation
Choose not to bring up the offense to hurt them again—even when you feel like you have the right to.

Watching your words
Avoid speaking poorly about the person that hurt you. Speak with grace or keep your mouth closed.

Praying for them
Pray blessings over them and ask God to work in both of you.

Extending Kindness when it’s hard
Find small ways to be kind, without anything in return.

Setting boundaries without bitterness
You can forgive while setting healthy limits.

Don’t keep score
Don’t keep reminding them of their mess up.

Be open to reconciliation, when it's safe.
If the person is repentant and has taken steps to be trustworthy, take small steps to rebuilding.

3. Walk in Grace
Remember, it’s the grace of God that allows us to be able to receive forgiveness in the first place. Grace covers every failure, forgives every sin, and restores our relationship with God. Grace is God’s gift of love, forgiveness, and power. Its purpose is to save you, strengthen you, and transform you. Walking it out means you receiving, trusting, and extending it everyday.

Romans 5:20-21
20 Now the law came in to increase the trespass, but where sin increased, grace abounded all the more, 21 so that, as sin reigned in death, grace also might reign through righteousness leading to eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.

His grace saves us. But not only does it save us, it empowers us. Grace gives us the strength to endure trials, overcome temptation, and live for Christ. His grace is sufficient for you. But grace isn’t a reason to keep walking out sin. While His grace makes a way for us, it's that same grace that empowers us to change.

Titus 2:11-12
11 For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation for all people, 12 training us to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age

His grace gives us the ability to walk away from sin and ungodliness. Grace isn’t just a pardon, it’s power.

Many Christians think of grace only as the kindness that forgives us when we fall, but grace is also the strength that helps us stand, endure, and grow.

Grace is the practical step we take with forgiveness. But just like forgiveness, before we can give it, we have to receive it. What does it look like to walk in Grace?

We have to receive grace daily. Grace reminds us that we aren’t earning God’s love for us, but we are living in God’s love for us. If this is hard for you, here is something you can say in those moments you are having a hard time receiving it:

God’s grace covers me. I’m accepted, not because I’m perfect, but because Jesus is. We also need to extend grace daily. The only time that we start having a hard time extending grace is when we forget the amount of Grace that we need God to pour out on us every day. Once you have experienced His grace, it changes how you treat people. Once you’ve truly experienced the grace of God, His unearned love, His forgiveness, and His patience, it changes how you treat people.Grace received is grace that should be reflected.

Luke 6:36
Be merciful, just as your father is merciful.
This is how God treats us, even when we’re undeserving, messy, or slow to grow. When you understand that you’ve been forgiven of much, it becomes much easier to forgive others.

Grace extended doesn’t mean you approve of someone’s wrong behavior, it means you arereleased from the prison of your bitterness. It’s not about what they deserve. It’s about who God is, and who you are now in Him.

When you are able to do this we understand that we don’t have to strive for His love but we trust in the work God has done. Grace frees you from performance based faith. It helps you rest in God’s work, not just your own.

Walking in grace means you aren’t dragging shame and guilt with you. You are walking in the confidence that God has given you through his grace.

Bouncing back isn’t about perfection—it’s about grace in motion.

In order to bounce back we have to:
Believe God’s truth,
own our mistakes,
unlock forgiveness,
navigate our emotions,
choose grace,
extend mercy.

We are all in process. Many of us are just trying to figure out how we can move forward. Remember, we can’t let our emotions be the driving force behind our decisions, we need to understand God’s forgiveness, and we need to walk in grace.

Maybe today your emotions have been in the driver’s seat for too long…
Maybe guilt has kept you from receiving God’s forgiveness…
Maybe you’ve hurt someone and need to make it right…
Maybe you’re holding on to bitterness instead of grace…
It’s time to bounce back.
Let God’s truth reset your heart. Let forgiveness flow through you. Let grace empower you.
The altar is open. Let’s pray.

What is the Holy Spirit saying to you through this message?

How does he want you to respond?