Neighborhood Church

When it comes to parenting, awareness is key.

We talk about these things because we want to grow.

God wants what’s best for our lives.

Not everyone is a parent.
Not everyone had healthy role models growing up.
Every family looks different.
There is no such thing as a perfect parent.

Identity Parenting
Identity parenting is when we, as parents, begin to attach our value—our worth, and our fulfillment—to our kids’ success.

Identity parenting shows up when we need our child to be a reflection of us rather than a person entrusted to us.

Identity parenting isn’t really about our kids, it’s about us.

Enmeshment
When we wrap up our identity in our kids, we keep them from discovering their own.

"Enmeshed parents see their children’s behavior as a direct reflection of their own worth and identity. They often rely on their children to meet emotional needs they haven’t addressed in their own lives.”
Psychologist Dr. Lindsay Gibson

“In an enmeshed family, personal boundaries are diffused, roles are confused, and there is a marked over-concern for others, which leads to a loss of individual autonomy.”
Family therapist Dr. Salvador Minuchin

The way of Jesus is good news for exhausted kids—and for exhausted parents.

If we want to be healthy parents, we have to be secure in our own identity.

Our identity is rooted in the unfailing, unchanging, unconditional love of God.

Differentiation
Differentiation of self is the ability to be in emotional contact with others yet still autonomous in one’s own emotional functioning.

How much of my emotional baggage am I inadvertently handing down to my kids?

If you want to raise healthy kids, the best thing you can do is become a healthy parent.

"The greatest gift we can give our children is our own healing.”
Henri Nouwen