Towne South Church of Christ
THE ROAD TO RECOVERY - Confess the Truth
Locations & Times
Towne South Church of Christ, Elizabeth City, NC. 27909
2224 Peartree Rd, Elizabeth City, NC 27909, USA
Sunday 8:45 AM
Would you answer two questions as we begin this message? The first is: What is your habitual sin? The Bible says, “…let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles.” (Hebrews 12:1). No one that I know, is perfect. We all sin. But some sins entangle us more easily than others. All of us have habits, hurts and hang-ups that seem to constantly grip us and hold us back from the abundant life that Jesus wants us to have. It may be an alcohol or drug addiction. It could be a sexual addiction, pornography, cussing, overeating, smoking, chewing, gambling, losing your tempter. What is the sin that most often trips you up?
The second question is this: Do you really want to overcome it? Jesus once encountered a man who had been paralyzed for 38 years, and the first question he asked him was: Do you want to get well? Now that may sound like a silly question at first. Of course anyone who can’t walk wants to be able to walk. But you have to consider that relying on others had become a way of life for him. Did he really want all the responsibility and work that comes along with being self-reliant? Did he like feeling sorry for himself? Maybe you have a habitual, entangling sin that has been tripping you up for some time. You’ve asked God to forgive you and heal you, but are you really sincere? If you’re completely honest, one of the reasons you give into the sin is because you enjoy it. It produces pleasure at least for a little while. You enjoy the occasional, but diminishing thrill, and you nurse it along and keep it alive because you don’t really want to give it up. Do you really want to get well? That’s a legitimate question that we all need to ask ourselves, because today we’re going to focus on what I think is one of the hardest steps to take on the Road to Recovery: To admit to God, to myself and to another human being the exact nature of my wrongs.
That’s why groups are so important. The Celebrate Recovery program which we started here this past Friday night is a place where people can confess the truth to other people who struggle in the group. They may say, “Hello, I’m John Doe and I’m an alcoholic. Or, “Hello, I’m Jane Doe and I’m a compulsive gambler.” It’s one thing to admit the truth to God and yourself, but it is a gigantic step to confess the truth to others. But that’s exactly what the Bible commands us to do. It says…
16Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective. (James 5:16)
With that in mind I want us to see three aspects of confession that ought to motivate us to take this important yet difficult step. The first thing we need to understand about confession is that….
The second question is this: Do you really want to overcome it? Jesus once encountered a man who had been paralyzed for 38 years, and the first question he asked him was: Do you want to get well? Now that may sound like a silly question at first. Of course anyone who can’t walk wants to be able to walk. But you have to consider that relying on others had become a way of life for him. Did he really want all the responsibility and work that comes along with being self-reliant? Did he like feeling sorry for himself? Maybe you have a habitual, entangling sin that has been tripping you up for some time. You’ve asked God to forgive you and heal you, but are you really sincere? If you’re completely honest, one of the reasons you give into the sin is because you enjoy it. It produces pleasure at least for a little while. You enjoy the occasional, but diminishing thrill, and you nurse it along and keep it alive because you don’t really want to give it up. Do you really want to get well? That’s a legitimate question that we all need to ask ourselves, because today we’re going to focus on what I think is one of the hardest steps to take on the Road to Recovery: To admit to God, to myself and to another human being the exact nature of my wrongs.
That’s why groups are so important. The Celebrate Recovery program which we started here this past Friday night is a place where people can confess the truth to other people who struggle in the group. They may say, “Hello, I’m John Doe and I’m an alcoholic. Or, “Hello, I’m Jane Doe and I’m a compulsive gambler.” It’s one thing to admit the truth to God and yourself, but it is a gigantic step to confess the truth to others. But that’s exactly what the Bible commands us to do. It says…
16Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective. (James 5:16)
With that in mind I want us to see three aspects of confession that ought to motivate us to take this important yet difficult step. The first thing we need to understand about confession is that….
I. Confession is difficult.
It’s difficult for a number of reasons. First of all, it’s difficult because…
1. We blame others.
We’ll say, “Well, I’m not perfect.” Or, “My husband has been neglecting me.” Or, “My wife has just let herself go.” Or, “My parents abused me.” Or, “My job is so stressful.” Others may have made their contribution, but we are responsible for how we react to what people may have done to us.
And it’s really hard for us to accept responsibility for what we have done. We want to let ourselves off easily and confess in generalities… “Lord forgive me of my many sins.” But it’s really difficult to be specific and take the blame ourselves. It’s very difficult to confess the truth and not blame others. Another reason confession is difficult is because…
2. We rationalize.
We say, “Oh, I don’t have a problem, I can quit at anytime.” Or, “It’s not an addiction, it’s just a diversion.” Or, “I just use it for recreational purposes.” Or, “It’s no worse than what you see every night on cable T.V.” Or, “I never bet what I can’t afford to lose.”
Someone said, the word rationalize is exactly that: rational lies. But they are lies.
But I think the biggest reason it’s difficult to confess our sins to another person is because…
3. We want to protect our image.
If I confess to you the sin that I struggle with, I’m afraid you’ll lose respect for me. And the truth is we all have weak egos. None of us want to make ourselves vulnerable to others, because we want to appear as if we have it all together. The desire to want to protect our image causes us to hide our weaknesses and to keep our sins a secret. Someone once said, “You’re only as sick as your secrets.”
The Bible says…
13 He who conceals his sins does not prosper, but whoever confesses and renounces them finds mercy. (Proverbs 28:13)
Even though confession is difficult, we must tell someone the truth about who we are and how we struggle.
It’s difficult for a number of reasons. First of all, it’s difficult because…
1. We blame others.
We’ll say, “Well, I’m not perfect.” Or, “My husband has been neglecting me.” Or, “My wife has just let herself go.” Or, “My parents abused me.” Or, “My job is so stressful.” Others may have made their contribution, but we are responsible for how we react to what people may have done to us.
And it’s really hard for us to accept responsibility for what we have done. We want to let ourselves off easily and confess in generalities… “Lord forgive me of my many sins.” But it’s really difficult to be specific and take the blame ourselves. It’s very difficult to confess the truth and not blame others. Another reason confession is difficult is because…
2. We rationalize.
We say, “Oh, I don’t have a problem, I can quit at anytime.” Or, “It’s not an addiction, it’s just a diversion.” Or, “I just use it for recreational purposes.” Or, “It’s no worse than what you see every night on cable T.V.” Or, “I never bet what I can’t afford to lose.”
Someone said, the word rationalize is exactly that: rational lies. But they are lies.
But I think the biggest reason it’s difficult to confess our sins to another person is because…
3. We want to protect our image.
If I confess to you the sin that I struggle with, I’m afraid you’ll lose respect for me. And the truth is we all have weak egos. None of us want to make ourselves vulnerable to others, because we want to appear as if we have it all together. The desire to want to protect our image causes us to hide our weaknesses and to keep our sins a secret. Someone once said, “You’re only as sick as your secrets.”
The Bible says…
13 He who conceals his sins does not prosper, but whoever confesses and renounces them finds mercy. (Proverbs 28:13)
Even though confession is difficult, we must tell someone the truth about who we are and how we struggle.
II. Confession requires discernment.
When the Bible says, “Confess yours sins to each other and pray for one another,” that doesn’t mean that you need to confess to just anyone or to everyone. You need to be very selective about those to whom you will confess. Here are several guidelines about choosing the person to whom you will confess.
1. Choose a Christian who shares you convictions.
1Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers. (Psalm 1:1)
Make sure the person you confess to is a believer in Christ. Preferably somebody who is at about the same spiritual level as you.
2. Choose someone who is authentic.
You don’t want to confess to somebody who will gasp and say, “You did what? How could you call yourself and Christian and do that?”
However, you also do not need somebody who will say, “Oh, it doesn’t matter how you live. God’s grace will forgive you. It’s no big deal. I’ve done worse than that.”
You need somebody who will be understanding, but who will be courageous enough to confront you and hold you accountable.
3. Choose someone who is trustworthy.
One of the things that makes a recovery group successful is that there is a pledge to confidentiality. What’s said in the group stays in the group.
The Bible says…
13 A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy man keeps a secret. (Proverbs 11:13)
4. Choose someone of same sex unless they are a professional.
I think it’s too dangerous to share intimate concerns with someone of the opposite sex. Emotional intimacy is the first step toward infidelity. It’s what Gordon McDonald calls “tiptoeing on the spider’s web.”
Now it’s good if you can share your sin with your married partner because there is daily accountability. But sometimes it’s harder for a married partner to be as confrontational as needed. Most of us need someone of the same sex who can truthfully confront without threatening our marriage relationship.
The Bible says…
9Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: 10 If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up… 12 Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken. (Ecclesiastes 3:9, 10, 12)
Confession is difficult. Choosing the right person or people to confess to requires discernment, and that’s why understandably a lot of people want to avoid this step, but I want you to see that…
When the Bible says, “Confess yours sins to each other and pray for one another,” that doesn’t mean that you need to confess to just anyone or to everyone. You need to be very selective about those to whom you will confess. Here are several guidelines about choosing the person to whom you will confess.
1. Choose a Christian who shares you convictions.
1Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers. (Psalm 1:1)
Make sure the person you confess to is a believer in Christ. Preferably somebody who is at about the same spiritual level as you.
2. Choose someone who is authentic.
You don’t want to confess to somebody who will gasp and say, “You did what? How could you call yourself and Christian and do that?”
However, you also do not need somebody who will say, “Oh, it doesn’t matter how you live. God’s grace will forgive you. It’s no big deal. I’ve done worse than that.”
You need somebody who will be understanding, but who will be courageous enough to confront you and hold you accountable.
3. Choose someone who is trustworthy.
One of the things that makes a recovery group successful is that there is a pledge to confidentiality. What’s said in the group stays in the group.
The Bible says…
13 A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy man keeps a secret. (Proverbs 11:13)
4. Choose someone of same sex unless they are a professional.
I think it’s too dangerous to share intimate concerns with someone of the opposite sex. Emotional intimacy is the first step toward infidelity. It’s what Gordon McDonald calls “tiptoeing on the spider’s web.”
Now it’s good if you can share your sin with your married partner because there is daily accountability. But sometimes it’s harder for a married partner to be as confrontational as needed. Most of us need someone of the same sex who can truthfully confront without threatening our marriage relationship.
The Bible says…
9Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: 10 If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up… 12 Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken. (Ecclesiastes 3:9, 10, 12)
Confession is difficult. Choosing the right person or people to confess to requires discernment, and that’s why understandably a lot of people want to avoid this step, but I want you to see that…
III. Confession is essential for healing.
Confessing the truth to another person does several things for us. For one thing…
1. It brings accountability.
A while back I heard about an apology telephone line. You dial it up and confess anything that you’ve done to an anonymous person and apologize for it. You could call this number if you had something on your chest that you wanted to confess. Now they say confession is good for the soul, but the problem with it is it’s anonymous. There’s no identification. No accountability.
If you have to look someone you know in the eye and say, “I’ve got a serious problem here.” You have a person who will not only understand and listen, they will hold you accountable. You know that if you stumble they’ll confront you. If you flirt with that temptation again, they will challenge you. You will be answerable to them, and them to you.
You see when you confess your habitual sin to someone who understands, they won’t be easily conned. You have to answer to another human being. And you will be exposed as a phony who doesn’t really mean to repent, or you will be reinforced to walk straight. The Bible says…
25Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body. (Ephesians 4:25)
Confessing the truth has another benefit.
2. It releases the power of prayer.
We read earlier…
16Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective. (James 5:16)
If you tell a friend, “I have a problem with my temper, would you pray that I have self- control?” If that friend prays every day for your strength, for wisdom for you, then positive things begin to happen. Jesus said…
19Again, I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything you ask for, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven. (Matthew 18:19)
Prayer releases super natural power to strengthen you. And when you know you’re being prayer for you don’t want to let your friend down. You want those prayers to be answered, and there is this heightened, constant awareness of God’s presence and power at work within you.
And when we confess the truth…
3. It demonstrates God’s acceptance.
Most of us have a difficult time believing that God can know everything about us and he still loves us and accepts us anyway. But if we confess our habitual sin to another believer and that believer forgives us and understands us and loves us anyway, then it helps us begin to grasp and believe that God can love me in spite of what he knows about me too.
Confession is good for the soul. But confession is also a tangible demonstration of God’s unconditional love. When we confess our sin to someone even when we are in the midst of it, and they accept us and forgive us and still love us and pray for us, it makes it all that much easier to believe and understand how God who knows everything about me, can still love me and forgiven me.
The Bible tells us in the book of Mark chapter 1 verse 5…
5The whole Judean countryside and all the people of Jerusalem went out to him [John the Baptist]. Confessing their sins, they were baptized by him in the Jordan River. (Mark 1:5)
John the Baptist was preaching in the wilderness and people came out to see him in droves. They told him the truth about their sins and John accepted them and offered them cleansing. And the whole purpose of what John was doing was preparing the people for the coming of Jesus the Messiah. Jesus was the Son of God who would know exactly what was going on in people’s hearts, but would still love them and welcome them and call them to change.
Confession is difficult, it requires discernment in choosing those to whom we confess, but it is essential for our healing. So what do you say? What is your habitual sin? Do you really want to get well? If you do then…confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. Because the prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.(James 5:16)
Confessing the truth to another person does several things for us. For one thing…
1. It brings accountability.
A while back I heard about an apology telephone line. You dial it up and confess anything that you’ve done to an anonymous person and apologize for it. You could call this number if you had something on your chest that you wanted to confess. Now they say confession is good for the soul, but the problem with it is it’s anonymous. There’s no identification. No accountability.
If you have to look someone you know in the eye and say, “I’ve got a serious problem here.” You have a person who will not only understand and listen, they will hold you accountable. You know that if you stumble they’ll confront you. If you flirt with that temptation again, they will challenge you. You will be answerable to them, and them to you.
You see when you confess your habitual sin to someone who understands, they won’t be easily conned. You have to answer to another human being. And you will be exposed as a phony who doesn’t really mean to repent, or you will be reinforced to walk straight. The Bible says…
25Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body. (Ephesians 4:25)
Confessing the truth has another benefit.
2. It releases the power of prayer.
We read earlier…
16Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective. (James 5:16)
If you tell a friend, “I have a problem with my temper, would you pray that I have self- control?” If that friend prays every day for your strength, for wisdom for you, then positive things begin to happen. Jesus said…
19Again, I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything you ask for, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven. (Matthew 18:19)
Prayer releases super natural power to strengthen you. And when you know you’re being prayer for you don’t want to let your friend down. You want those prayers to be answered, and there is this heightened, constant awareness of God’s presence and power at work within you.
And when we confess the truth…
3. It demonstrates God’s acceptance.
Most of us have a difficult time believing that God can know everything about us and he still loves us and accepts us anyway. But if we confess our habitual sin to another believer and that believer forgives us and understands us and loves us anyway, then it helps us begin to grasp and believe that God can love me in spite of what he knows about me too.
Confession is good for the soul. But confession is also a tangible demonstration of God’s unconditional love. When we confess our sin to someone even when we are in the midst of it, and they accept us and forgive us and still love us and pray for us, it makes it all that much easier to believe and understand how God who knows everything about me, can still love me and forgiven me.
The Bible tells us in the book of Mark chapter 1 verse 5…
5The whole Judean countryside and all the people of Jerusalem went out to him [John the Baptist]. Confessing their sins, they were baptized by him in the Jordan River. (Mark 1:5)
John the Baptist was preaching in the wilderness and people came out to see him in droves. They told him the truth about their sins and John accepted them and offered them cleansing. And the whole purpose of what John was doing was preparing the people for the coming of Jesus the Messiah. Jesus was the Son of God who would know exactly what was going on in people’s hearts, but would still love them and welcome them and call them to change.
Confession is difficult, it requires discernment in choosing those to whom we confess, but it is essential for our healing. So what do you say? What is your habitual sin? Do you really want to get well? If you do then…confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. Because the prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.(James 5:16)
Invitation:
There are two confessions in the Christian life, there’s the confession of our sins to God and occasionally to another person. But there is also the confession of our faith in Christ to the church and to the world and we call that “the good confession.”
The Bible says, that if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved. (Romans 10:9, 10)
If you have never taken the step to surrender your life to Jesus Christ by publicly confessing your faith in him and being baptized into him for the forgiveness of your sins and the gift of the Holy Spirit, then we want to give you the opportunity to do that today.
There are two confessions in the Christian life, there’s the confession of our sins to God and occasionally to another person. But there is also the confession of our faith in Christ to the church and to the world and we call that “the good confession.”
The Bible says, that if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved. (Romans 10:9, 10)
If you have never taken the step to surrender your life to Jesus Christ by publicly confessing your faith in him and being baptized into him for the forgiveness of your sins and the gift of the Holy Spirit, then we want to give you the opportunity to do that today.