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Introduction

In the text we are using as a base or reference point for this morning's topical message, Jesus is making reference to something that his listeners would have been familiar within the Old Testament law, which was that it was wrong for a person to have sex with someone or even something that was not his/her spouse (Exodus 20:14). However, Jesus is taking it a step further to clarify the issue by saying that the desire to have sex with someone other than your spouse is mental adultery and sinful as well. So by saying this He is making it very plain that not only is the act of having sex with someone other than your spouse wrong, but so is the intention. In marriage, we must be faithful to our spouse not only with our body but also with our minds. Many people might say, “Well if the thought is sin, I may as well go ahead and do the action too since it’s sin.” That thinking is illogical because we can get control over our thought life.

In our modern-day culture sex sells like never before. You see it everywhere. Commercials, billboards, magazine racks, fashions are even becoming more and more revealing. There is one thing that has become a major problem. This thing is easy to access; it’s viewed in homes and even in some workplaces all over the country. Technology has gotten so savvy that now you can get it on your smartphone; wirelessly connect to it on your laptop. It is something that infiltrates the mind and changes your thinking allowing you to build your own imaginary sexual world and have virtual sex with whoever you want, whenever you want, wherever you want. That thing I am talking about is Pornography.

I. What is Pornography?
Pornography takes something that is beautiful when it occurs between a married man and woman and makes it dirty. God created the act of sexual union as a special gift for a husband and wife. It is a celebration of love that strengthens a marriage and builds oneness.

But pornography twists and perverts the beauty and biblical design of God's creation. The focus on sensual pleasure becomes such a powerful drug that destroys all that is important for the rest of their lives. It leads men and women to look at each other as nothing more than sex objects. It causes them to fantasize about sexual relationships with other people, and that's a terrible blow to their marital commitment. Porn is destructive.

A 2014 Proven Men Porn Survey (conducted across the nation by Barna Group), {located at https://www.provenmen.org/2014PornSurvey/} revealed that addiction to pornography is a problem in this country and that includes Christian men and women.

Pornography can be accessed in a number of ways, but the one that is the most widely used means to access it is the internet. The internet is not bad in and of itself. In fact, the internet is a great resource but just like many other things it has also been used to provide access to things that are harmful in nature such as pornography. The internet is a great technology, but by 1999 one in five children between the ages of 10 and 17 were sent a sexual solicitation over the internet

Pornography is a multibillion-dollar industry that focuses much of its attention on attracting 12-17-year-old boys with the intent of making them lifelong porn addicts. Pornography is just a point and click away and many of our youth are accidentally exposed to it while searching the internet to get information to complete homework projects. The average age of first exposure to internet pornography is 11 yrs old.

II. Why is Pornography a problem?
Pornography is dangerous and destructive for many reasons:
Here’s what one resource said…

An unrealistic view of the female body: The women shown in pornography come from a very narrow part of the wide spectrum of how real women look. They are usually young, In addition, these women may wear makeup from head to toe, they are filmed with lighting that hides blemishes, and the pictures may be airbrushed or digitally altered after they are taken.
How can a man look at these false images of "sexual perfection" and not begin to think less of his wife? How can he not be affected by these images? And when he thinks "I wish my wife looked like that" or "I wish my wife would do that" is he not coveting other women who do look that way? He is wanting his wife to imitate something she is not, to be someone other than God made her.

Wrong ideas and expectations about sex: Pornography is not real sex. Pornography has only one purpose, to make money for those who produce it. For this reason, the pornographers produce something that has only the most visually powerful aspects of sexuality - the faster and stronger the turn on, the more likely a man will come back and pay for more. This results in pornography being very different from real sex.

Here are a few wrong ideas and expectations about sex because of pornography.

1. Things like love, respect, romance, and commitment are not found in pornography.
2. Spontaneous sex with someone not known is common.
3. In pornography videos, the women do not need foreplay - either they are ready at the drop of a pair of pants, or they need only a few seconds of stimulation.
4. The women are insatiable, they climax repeatedly, and they are so desperate for sex they will do anything with anyone.
5. Illicit sex arouses, so pornography is full of fornication, adultery, lesbianism, threesomes, orgies, rape, and other things that we will not even mention!

It is impossible for someone to repeatedly view this kind of thing and not be affected by it. Normal sex acts start to seem boring, and a man who has been happy with his sex life can become frustrated that it's not like pornography. A man may start to think there is something wrong with his wife or get mad at her for not being like the women in pornography.
Women can also be affected negatively by viewing pornography. They may feel ugly or think they can not turn their husband on because they don't look like the women they see. They may start to doubt their sexuality because they can't do, or don't want to do, the things they see.

III. Pornography often leads to Masturbation
The need to view pornography is usually a precursor to masturbation. The more advanced forms of sexual addiction, such as multiple affairs, sex with prostitutes, or other illegal activities, generally have their beginnings in masturbation.

On the surface, masturbation would seem to be harmless. After all, it's just sex with yourself and the Bible does not ever address the issue directly. But there is more to masturbation than meets the eye. Since we are tripartite beings - body, soul, and spirit - masturbation affects us physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

Masturbation Addiction - Physical Aspects
As mentioned above, the "high" from masturbation addiction comes from the flood of chemicals that are released into the brain during orgasm. As the brain begins to crave this "high," the addict trains himself to climax quicker and more often. In addition, the addict becomes accustomed to the sensations of masturbation, sometimes to the point that "normal" sexual activity is not satisfying.

Masturbation Addiction - Emotional/Spiritual Aspects
Masturbation, by its very nature, is a selfish act. Since you are having sex with yourself, there is no need to please anyone else. The emotional nature tends to follow the same course. As sex becomes little more than another way to meet your own physical needs, the tendency is to ignore the emotional needs of your spouse as well. She becomes nothing more than an object for your sexual satisfaction.

Many people are quick to point out that masturbation is not specifically mentioned in the Bible, so there must not be anything wrong with it. Here is what one writer said in response to that:

Is masturbation wrong? Let me address the issue mainly for men. I cannot imagine sexual orgasm in the loins without sexual image in the mind. I know there are nocturnal emissions, which I regard as innocent and helpful, but I doubt that they are ever orgasmic apart from a sexual dream that supplies the necessary image in the mind. Evidently God has constituted the connection between sexual orgasm and sexual thought in such a way that the force and pleasure of orgasm is dependent on the thought or images in our minds.
Therefore in order to masturbate, it is necessary to get vivid and exciting thoughts or images into the mind. This can be done by pure imagination or by pictures or movies or stories or real persons. These images always involve women as sexual objects. I use the word “object” because in order for a woman to be a true sexual “subject” in our imagination she must in reality be one with whom we are experiencing what we are imagining. This is not the case with masturbation.
So I vote no on masturbation. There may be other reasons why it is wrong. For now I rest my vote on the inevitable sexual images which accompany masturbation and which turn women into sexual objects. The sexual thoughts that enable masturbation do not help any man to treat women with greater respect.

IV. How to overcome the problem of pornography
Pornography is a serious problem but if you or someone you know struggles in this area you can be set free from this terrible and destructive behavior. If you don’t know Christ, the first thing to do is receive Him as your Saviour (explain). If you know Christ lives within you, here are some suggested steps for dealing with the trap of pornography:

1. Face the facts
"For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God" (Romans 3:23). There are many ways that we humans sin and fall short—lying, greed, stealing, adultery, taking the Lord's name in vain, and many other selfish acts. All sins are equally serious before our Holy God.
If there is some sexual sin in your life, the first step toward improvement is to understand and admit what you have done. If you have given yourself to pornography or sexual fantasies involving people other than your spouse, you have been committing adultery. Jesus said:
"You have heard that it was said to those of old, 'You shall not commit adultery.' "But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart" (Matthew 5:27-28).

2. Spiritual salvation
The single biggest factor in combating such an addiction is to come under the authority of Jesus Christ. You are involved in a spiritual battle. "The Scripture contains no promise of help in overcoming temptation for those who are unsaved." If you are not yet a Christian, we strongly urge you to confess your sin and totally surrender your life to Him. Accept His gift of eternal salvation for your soul. After accepting Christ, some are totally delivered from their addictions.

If there is no doubt that you have already committed your life to Jesus Christ and are relying on His sin-covering blood for your salvation, then do not let your sin cause you to doubt your salvation. Instead, deal with your sin. Confess it, and rededicate your life to Christ

3. Admit your weakness, seek God's help
All humans are selfish and sinful; it is our nature. Addiction to pornography and other sexual sins are particularly potent in their effect, like a seductive and powerful drug. Once it has a hold on you, it is difficult to resist. In fact, it is virtually impossible to overcome on your own. You must have God's help.
God cannot work with you if you are still trying to overcome sin on your own; it is a form of pride. You are, in effect, saying to God "I can take care of this myself." Consider these verses:
"The wicked in his proud countenance does not seek God…" (Psalm 10:4). "Pride goes before destruction…" (Proverbs 16:18). "When pride comes, then comes shame; But with the humble is wisdom" (Proverbs 11:2).
"You will keep him in perfect peace, Whose mind is stayed on You, Because he trusts in You" (Isa 26:3, NKJV).

"Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you" (I Peter 5:6-7)

4. Prayer power

Prayer is a conversation with our Creator. It is a child's communion with his Father. The Bible emphasizes that it should have an extremely high priority in our lives. Continual prayer is especially important to your recovery. If there was ever a time in your life when you need to pray, it is now.

Here's how to pray, each and every day…

Confess all known sin
Read: Psalm 51 | Mark 7:20-23 | 1 John 1:7-10

Renounce conformity to the world
Read: Romans 12:2, 6:13-14

Seek an intimate relationship with Jesus Christ. He will give you a richer, more meaningful life.
Read: John 10:10, 15:5-12 | Ephesians 3:14-19 | Philippians 3:10-14

Offer your body as a “living sacrifice” to God
See: Romans 12:1-2 | 1 Corinthians 6:19-20

Worship God
Read: John 4:23-24 | Philippians 3:3

Thank and praise God. Thank Him for his grace and mercy, praise Him, and keep seeking His mercy. Thank God for answered prayer.
Philippians 4:6-7 | Colossians 4:2

Ask God for help in living a pure and loving life
See: Philippians 4:6-7 | Hebrews 4:16


5. Reading and memorizing Scripture

Memorizing scripture is an often-overlooked weapon that should be in every Christian's arsenal. Memorize James 1:14 and 1 Corinthians 10:13 and quote them when you are tempted. Open your Bible at Psalm 51 and make it your own prayer.

6. Accountability
Accountability is a scriptural principle that tells us to “... be subject to one another in the fear of Christ" (Ephesians 5:21). This means you choose to submit your life to the scrutiny of another person in order to gain spiritual strength, growth, and balance. If you do not go to your pastor first, do so immediately after making open confession to the Lord. He is spiritually responsible to pray for you and teach you God's truth. If he is the man of God he should be, he will gladly pray for and with you, and exhort you in your spiritual growth.
Although it is healthy to be ashamed of the sins you are involved in, don't let that shame become one of Satan's weapons to keep you trapped. Secrecy is often a Christian's biggest enemy, while confession can bring freedom and release from the bondage of an overwhelming sense of shame.

7. Guard your heart, avoid temptations
Guard your heart with all diligence (Proverbs 4:23). Don't let the demonic realm influence your thought-life (Ephesians 6:12-20). If you give yourself to sinful fantasies and pursuits, you will become their slave (Romans 6:16).
A simple change of habit can do wonders in keeping you from temptation. For example, if you are most tempted when you spend time on the computer after your spouse has gone to bed, then make a commitment to stay off of the computer during that time. If you know that a certain street you drive down causes you to lust due to certain establishments on it, or prostitutes that hang around, or alluring billboards, you would be wise to travel a different route. "Turn my eyes away from worthless things; preserve my life according to your word" (Psalm 119:37).
A good habit can be formed in around two weeks. Keep bouncing your gaze away, and remarkable improvement can be noticed rather quickly. Psalm 101:3 I will set before my eyes no vile thing. The deeds of faithless men I hate; they will not cling to me.

Sex is like fire. In a fireplace (the confines of marriage), it’s warm and delightful. Outside the hearth, it’s destructive and uncontrollable.