Exciting First Baptist Church, Jasper
"Listen to Your Mama" (Proverbs 1:7-9)
All of us need Life Coach, a Mentor that can bring intensely practical wisdom into the real life issues we face. Nowhere is that more needed than in our families. These days, the "new normal" for family feels like a moving target. Much of what was nailed down a generation ago has been pried loose. We want to take the Sundays between Mother's Day and Father's Day to hear and receive the wisdom of God for our families. Get ready for solid help that will outlast the pop culture counsel of our times.
Locations & Times
Jasper's First Baptist Church
1604 4th Ave, Jasper, AL 35501, USA
Sunday 10:15 AM
Proverbs is not fortune cookie, bumper sticker advice that's nice to have, but ultimately unimportant. Nor is Proverbs just an optional add-on for people who want to upgrade their lives...say from a 4 to a 7. Proverbs brings solid, serious, field-tested wisdom drawn from long personal experience that is endorsed by God Himself.
Proverbs 1:7-9 speak directly to your family. Pay close attention to every word: The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction. Hear, my son, your father's instruction, and forsake not your mother's teaching, for they are a graceful garland for your head and pendants for your neck.
Tucked into these ancient, wise words are six foundational, worldview-shaping truths that we need to properly calibrate our thinking about family.
Proverbs 1:7-9 speak directly to your family. Pay close attention to every word: The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction. Hear, my son, your father's instruction, and forsake not your mother's teaching, for they are a graceful garland for your head and pendants for your neck.
Tucked into these ancient, wise words are six foundational, worldview-shaping truths that we need to properly calibrate our thinking about family.
1. GOD DESIGNED THE FAMILY. Verse 8: Hear, my son, your father's instruction, and forsake not your mother's teaching. Let this biblical picture of a father and mother and children be restored in our minds as the norm. Why? Because this thing called a family is God’s idea, His plan, His way.
Remember how families got started in the first place? Genesis 1:27-28 summarizes it for us: So God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. And God blessed them. And God said to them, "Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth."
So how was this earth-filling fruitfulness supposed to happen? Was it about having sex with whomever you want, whenever you want, with pregnancies as the result? No, God’s plan was set forth in the next chapter of the Bible’s first book (Gen. 2:24): Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
So God purposed that children be born into a covenant relationship between one man and one woman called marriage—a relationship in which husband and wife hold fast to each other exclusively in a one-flesh union. This was how the earth would be filled with humans who are the image-bearers of God’s glory, and this is how couples display the covenant-relationship between God and His people. God did this, for HIs glory!
Remember how families got started in the first place? Genesis 1:27-28 summarizes it for us: So God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. And God blessed them. And God said to them, "Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth."
So how was this earth-filling fruitfulness supposed to happen? Was it about having sex with whomever you want, whenever you want, with pregnancies as the result? No, God’s plan was set forth in the next chapter of the Bible’s first book (Gen. 2:24): Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
So God purposed that children be born into a covenant relationship between one man and one woman called marriage—a relationship in which husband and wife hold fast to each other exclusively in a one-flesh union. This was how the earth would be filled with humans who are the image-bearers of God’s glory, and this is how couples display the covenant-relationship between God and His people. God did this, for HIs glory!
2. THE FAMILY IS GOD'S BASIC SCHOOL FOR INSTRUCTING CHILDREN ABOUT HOW TO LIVE IN THE WORLD. Verse 8: Hear, my son, your father's instruction, and forsake not your mother's teaching. The father is an instructor and the mother is a teacher, which means the children are the students and the family is a school.
God ordained the family not just to be fruitful and fill the earth with people, but to fill the earth with instructed people, with taught people. Psalm 78:5-7 says it this way: He established a testimony in Jacob and appointed a law in Israel, which He commanded our fathers to teach to their children, that the next generation might know them, the children yet unborn, and arise and tell them to their children, so that they should set their hope in God and not forget the works of God, but keep his commandments.
God will hold us accountable for what we modeled and taught to our children, especially about Himself. He wants us to raise up a generation of radically committed, careful thinking, risk-taking Christians, and He wills that the next generation learn this in a Christ-centered, Bible-saturated home that makes Him and His will a priority.
That raises two important implications:
A. You must make your child's spiritual progress paramount over sports and other activities. I know I may make some upset, but think about this. We all know the statistics about what happens when our kids go to college. The majority of them quit the church, lapse morally, and some never come back. Of course, we talk about the spiritual warfare at colleges and we blame the church for not preparing their child for the temptations and challenges to their faith they will face. But the primary responsibility for the spiritual upbuilding of our children does not rest with the church. The church stands as a strong partner with parents, but it cannot and does not replace mom and dad in this role.
B. When extracurricular activities conflict with church and spiritual opportunities, the spiritual needs to win. We are signaling what is really important when we let other sports and other activities trump church. Now, I played sports all through elementary, middle and high school, and so did our two sons. But there were limits on me growing up and there were priorities set for our two sons as well. Believe me, at this stage in life with one son 31 and the other 27, no one looks back wish we had played more sports. What lasts, what matters most, is their relationship with Christ!
God ordained the family not just to be fruitful and fill the earth with people, but to fill the earth with instructed people, with taught people. Psalm 78:5-7 says it this way: He established a testimony in Jacob and appointed a law in Israel, which He commanded our fathers to teach to their children, that the next generation might know them, the children yet unborn, and arise and tell them to their children, so that they should set their hope in God and not forget the works of God, but keep his commandments.
God will hold us accountable for what we modeled and taught to our children, especially about Himself. He wants us to raise up a generation of radically committed, careful thinking, risk-taking Christians, and He wills that the next generation learn this in a Christ-centered, Bible-saturated home that makes Him and His will a priority.
That raises two important implications:
A. You must make your child's spiritual progress paramount over sports and other activities. I know I may make some upset, but think about this. We all know the statistics about what happens when our kids go to college. The majority of them quit the church, lapse morally, and some never come back. Of course, we talk about the spiritual warfare at colleges and we blame the church for not preparing their child for the temptations and challenges to their faith they will face. But the primary responsibility for the spiritual upbuilding of our children does not rest with the church. The church stands as a strong partner with parents, but it cannot and does not replace mom and dad in this role.
B. When extracurricular activities conflict with church and spiritual opportunities, the spiritual needs to win. We are signaling what is really important when we let other sports and other activities trump church. Now, I played sports all through elementary, middle and high school, and so did our two sons. But there were limits on me growing up and there were priorities set for our two sons as well. Believe me, at this stage in life with one son 31 and the other 27, no one looks back wish we had played more sports. What lasts, what matters most, is their relationship with Christ!
3. THE BASELINE THEME OF ALL FAMILY INSTRUCTION IS THE FEAR OF THE LORD. Verse 7: The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge. This is the primary theme that should permeate all our parental explaining and counseling, modeling and correcting, day-in and day-out.
But teaching your children to fear the Lord is not teaching them to be afraid that if they cross Him, He’s going to lower the hammer on them. That’s the way the lost respond to the Lord, and rightly so. Believers fear Him in a new way. We fear that we might grieve the One who loves us so much. The fear of the Lord for a believer is combination of awestruck reverence and a deep desire to please the Lord. That’s the kind of fear Proverbs 1 prizes and promotes at home.
You can have children whom you’ve taught to hold a spoon and walk and say "please" and tie their shoes and read and look both ways and cut the grass and put on make-up and drive a car. But if your child hasn’t learned to reverence and trust and stand in awe of God from you, you’ve missed the whole point. God designed the family. The family is a school. And the primary curriculum is reverent awe and humble obedience to God.
But teaching your children to fear the Lord is not teaching them to be afraid that if they cross Him, He’s going to lower the hammer on them. That’s the way the lost respond to the Lord, and rightly so. Believers fear Him in a new way. We fear that we might grieve the One who loves us so much. The fear of the Lord for a believer is combination of awestruck reverence and a deep desire to please the Lord. That’s the kind of fear Proverbs 1 prizes and promotes at home.
You can have children whom you’ve taught to hold a spoon and walk and say "please" and tie their shoes and read and look both ways and cut the grass and put on make-up and drive a car. But if your child hasn’t learned to reverence and trust and stand in awe of God from you, you’ve missed the whole point. God designed the family. The family is a school. And the primary curriculum is reverent awe and humble obedience to God.
4. UNDER GOD, BOTH FATHERS AND MOTHERS SHARE RESPONSIBILITY FOR FAMILY INSTRUCTION. Verse 8 presents the united front of father and mother taking up the charge to do team teaching of their children.
And O what an impact it can make. In 2 Timothy, Paul mentored a young pastor named Timothy, whose upbringing wasn't ideal. Timothy's dad was either an absentee dad or unbelieving, so any spiritual instruction had to come from his mother and, we learn, his grandmother.
In 2 Tim. 1:5, Paul wrote these words to Timothy: I am reminded of your sincere faith, a faith that dwelt first in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice and now, I am sure, dwells in you as well. Later, in the same letter, Paul made the connection (3:14-15): But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have firmly believed, knowing from whom you learned it (there’s the influence of mom and grandma for Christ) and how from childhood you have been acquainted with the sacred writings (by example and teaching, they imprinted the Word in young Timothy’s life), which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus.
Perhaps you are in a home where your husband isn't the spiritual leader God called him to be, and you are undertaking that role. Be encouraged by this: though Timothy's home was spiritually ideal, the impact of his mother and grandmother's living faith and teaching marked him for life! Don't grow weary in this well-doing! You will reap if you don't faint!
And O what an impact it can make. In 2 Timothy, Paul mentored a young pastor named Timothy, whose upbringing wasn't ideal. Timothy's dad was either an absentee dad or unbelieving, so any spiritual instruction had to come from his mother and, we learn, his grandmother.
In 2 Tim. 1:5, Paul wrote these words to Timothy: I am reminded of your sincere faith, a faith that dwelt first in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice and now, I am sure, dwells in you as well. Later, in the same letter, Paul made the connection (3:14-15): But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have firmly believed, knowing from whom you learned it (there’s the influence of mom and grandma for Christ) and how from childhood you have been acquainted with the sacred writings (by example and teaching, they imprinted the Word in young Timothy’s life), which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus.
Perhaps you are in a home where your husband isn't the spiritual leader God called him to be, and you are undertaking that role. Be encouraged by this: though Timothy's home was spiritually ideal, the impact of his mother and grandmother's living faith and teaching marked him for life! Don't grow weary in this well-doing! You will reap if you don't faint!
5. GOD CALLS SONS AND DAUGHTERS TO BE SUBMISSIVE TO THEIR PARENTS. Verse 8: Hear, my son, your father's instruction, and forsake not your mother's teaching. Those verbs, hear and forsake not are imperatives in the Hebrew language. They are commands that serve warning against two common types of rebellion. The first happens while a child is home. He is tempted not to listen when his parents speak. So Solomon says, Hear, my son, your father's instruction. The other kind of rebellion tends to happen once the child is away from home. He faces intense pressure to abandon what he has been taught. So Solomon adds, forsake not your mother's teaching.
Proverbs 1:8 is God looking at every child, every teenager, and saying, "When you are at home, tune your ears to your parents’ voices. Don’t ignore them or discount what they say. God is so serious about this that He made it a part of 10 Commandments: Honor your father and mother. And honor happens when you respectfully listen to your parents and heed their instructions, even when you are away from home no one can see but God.
Proverbs 1:8 is God looking at every child, every teenager, and saying, "When you are at home, tune your ears to your parents’ voices. Don’t ignore them or discount what they say. God is so serious about this that He made it a part of 10 Commandments: Honor your father and mother. And honor happens when you respectfully listen to your parents and heed their instructions, even when you are away from home no one can see but God.
6. GOD PROMISES REWARDS FOR SONS AND DAUGHTERS WHO DON'T TURN AWAY FROM THEIR PARENTS' TEACHING. Verse 9: for they [that is, hearing your father's instruction and not forsaking your mother's teaching] are a graceful garland for your head and pendants for your neck. In other words, when you receive the instruction of your dad and the teaching of your mom, rooted in the fear of the Lord, it will be like receiving gifts that will bless and mark you for the rest of your life.
On this Mother’s Day, I close with a word to all the moms who stay perpetually exhausted and can grow weary in well-doing with the heavy homework God has assigned them: your diligence in the fear of the Lord now will pay huge dividends later. By imparting through your example and teaching what it looks like to trust and cherish and worship and value and give your life as a living sacrifice for God before your children’s eyes, you are stamping something on their hearts that will encourage and strengthen and guide your children for the rest of their lives! You will never regret this holy work! And God will not forget your obedient investment in the next generation!
