Redeeming Anger: Turning Pain Into PurposeSample

The Power of Perspective

"Do you see what I see?" This simple question holds immense value when trying to align perspectives during a conflict in a relationship. Our views often differ because we interpret the world through our experiences, beliefs, and values. How we perceive life is entirely individual—the lens through which we observe any issue or situation is unique.

I often conduct a simple exercise to help people understand these differences in perspective. I hold up a flat, rectangular object and ask them to describe what they see. Even when a husband and wife sit next to each other and look at it from the same angle, their descriptions vary. Some say it’s dark brown, black, metallic, shiny, or like a black hole. Others may insist it’s a square, while some might focus on the dimensions. In this exercise, the same object is perceived in vastly different ways.

I’m also looking at the same object from an entirely different angle. Instead of describing it in colors and dimensions, I see a colorful 2004 calendar. This illustrates how perspective works: we can look at the same object or situation but see something completely different.

In relationships, effective communication and emotional connection become difficult when either person isn't invested in explaining their perspective or listening to the other’s point of view. Simply describing what we see isn’t enough. We must also understand the bigger picture—what influences our perspective and what others see.

Understanding ourselves and resolving internal conflicts allows us to communicate our perspective more effectively and promotes the ability to respond instead of react. Reactions escalate disagreements, but if we use the tools available and learn how to listen and respond well, we create opportunities for interdependent relationships.

Unlock Your Life:

Learn how to respond versus react by focusing on these three essential steps:

1. Take time to understand yourself (your triggers and the “chunks” in your Cup that cause inner turmoil and defensiveness).
2. Understand personality differences and needs between yourself and others. Recognize that other people have different experiences, beliefs, thoughts, and perspectives. Be willing to learn how to actively listen to understand them instead of haphazardly responding or reacting to what you think they are saying.
3. Invest time and effort into improving your communication skills to facilitate healthy conflict resolution and help maintain peace within yourself and others.

Partnering With God:

Father God, give me the willingness to be introspective and become more self-aware of what causes my reactions and my need to be right when I disagree. I want to respond with love to the people you have placed in my life. I know that I need to set my pride aside and see what You see in my brothers and sisters. Give me eyes to see, ears to hear, and a heart of flesh vs stone so I can live in harmony with myself and those around me. Thank You for revealing my blind spots. I'm asking You to transform me from the inside out. Lead me, teach me, guide me into all Truth so that I can be light in the darkness. In Jesus' Name, Amen!

Was this reading plan helpful?

Feel free to download a free chapter of my book, "The Keys to Unlock Life Without Limits".

Let me know how else I can encourage and support your journey of emotional and relational healing.