How Can You Improve Your Marriage? 10 Marriages in the Bibleಮಾದರಿ

Isaac and Rebekah

When Children Come into Marriage

Verses for Reflection:

- Genesis 25

- Genesis 26

Today, there is a growing trend of child-free living, vacations without children, and even child-free hotels. As a mother of three noisy children, who sometimes make me want to escape, I can understand this desire. However, it seems that its roots lie in the idol of comfort. And idols rarely deliver what they promise. In the process of giving birth and raising children, there is a deep, redemptive work of God hidden. Just try raising a person in this evil world, with a heart full of sin that needs changing every day! It is not just difficult—it is impossible without God's help. And while parenthood can strengthen a marriage, it often reveals our weaknesses, differing perspectives, temperaments, faith, and approaches.

This was also the case in the marriage of Isaac and Rebekah. Everything started beautifully—like a fairy tale. She was a hardworking, kind girl taking a bold step into the unknown. He was the descendant of the promises, the son of Abraham, who mourned for his mother. Isaac was forty years old when he married Rebekah, and it was true love at first sight. But for twenty years, they had no children. This period of trial was present in every patriarchal family—God seemed to leave this area completely under His control. Eventually, the Lord heard Isaac's prayer, and Rebekah became pregnant with twins.

Even in her womb, her children struggled with each other. And when Rebekah sought the Lord about this, He revealed to her the future of her sons: both would become the founders of nations, but the younger would prevail over the older. And this is where the crack began to form between the couple—Isaac favored the elder son, Esau, while Rebekah loved Jacob.

Yet we still see tenderness in their relationship. Interestingly, Isaac, like his father Abraham, was afraid to admit to King Abimelech that Rebekah was his wife. And although both were no longer young, Rebekah remained a beautiful woman. But God put fear and respect in the king's heart for them, so they were safe.

Over the years, the situation became more complicated. Favoritism towards the children deepened the divide. The climax came with the deceptive situation regarding the parental blessing: Rebekah persuaded Jacob to pretend to be Esau. Why did she do this? Probably because she believed God's prophecy about Jacob, while Isaac did not. Therefore, he tried to bless the older son.

The birth and upbringing of children is a trial for marriage, a school of humility and love. I remember when I gave birth to my first daughter, I truly understood what sacrifice meant for the first time: you don’t sleep, you worry about the baby, you sacrifice yourself, your plans, your comfort. It is no wonder that many young people avoid parenthood—it is a path without guarantees. Who knows what your child will become?

Yet it is in this chaos, loss of control, fatigue, and uncertainty that we can see the Gospel. For Jesus—the Son of God—came into the world not as a mature man but as an infant, as a Child completely dependent on Mary and Joseph. And in this, He shares with us the vulnerability, family tension, and struggle for faithfulness. Christ—our Savior—lived the life of a child, a teenager, a son, to support you in parenthood today. He gave Himself for us when we were "imperfect children"—and therefore gives us the strength to love our children and build a marriage based not on convenience but on grace.

Questions for Reflection:

1. Have we fallen into the trap of favoritism in the family? Are we highlighting one child while neglecting others?

2. In what ways might we disagree with God regarding parenthood?

3. How can we raise our children together with our spouse instead of doing it alone?