Freedom Renewed: Healing From Addiction Through Grace and GrowthSample

Day 4: How Your Past Creates the Hijacker

When you were young, you might have felt free to explore and be the confident driver of the proverbial car of your life. You had the whole world in front of you. You were free to be yourself.

Then something happened. You might have experienced bullying, abuse, neglect, or family dysfunction of some kind. It might even have been porn exposure. Even the constant feeling of having nobody to depend on can overwhelm the child-sized version of yourself. Dealing with these types of experiences was beyond the capacity of your young mind, and nobody was there to help you work through it.

These experiences can result in an inner wound in your mind. Such wounds change you; they dysregulate your nervous system. They create the need in your brain to eradicate the discomfort that ensues. Porn use becomes an unhealthy regulating mechanism. Getting rid of that discomfort, even for a moment, becomes a goal of your young emotional self.

So now, as you are cruising down the highway of your life, the pain of your childhood experiences and the pleasure of porn derail you from your original intended journey. You are pushed into the passenger seat of your car by your wounded inner self.

The Hijacker—the wounded, maladaptive version of yourself—has taken over the vehicle of your mind and is now in control. He did it to help you survive, but now he has had you stuck in survival mode for far too long. The Hijacker still feels the intense need to protect himself from the wounds inside and the world outside. But now it is time for you to thrive.

Every urge to watch porn is a call for help. The child inside is speaking to you. He says, Do the work for me; free me from this cycle. It’s time to end the madness of survival. We can thrive in the life we have always wanted. Let me out so we can!

Response: Reflecting on the concept of "The Hijacker," how have past experiences or wounds shaped the way you cope with emotional pain today? Consider how these moments might have influenced your choices and led to the use of unhealthy mechanisms like pornography. How can inviting God into this healing process help you address these inner wounds and take back control of your life? What steps can you take today to allow God to guide you toward freedom, healing, and thriving in the life He has planned for you?

Prayer: God, please lead me toward healing the child inside me. Show me how I can take back the wheel of my life by seeking your healing for the traumas of my past instead of escaping and avoiding.