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Healing Along the Masculine Journey

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Day 3: Warrior (Age 20’s - Early 40’s)

There comes a time in one’s journey when the masculine heart learns to fight.

The Warrior Stage is when the transferring of will takes place. The will of the parents diminishes, while the will of the young masculine heart takes on new force. More choices are to be exercised by the young warrior. In both the spiritual and natural realms, the burden of responsibility begins to transfer from parent to child. Mom and Dad cease to do for the warrior the things he must learn to do himself. The questions now become: How do I discern between good and evil? And in a dangerous world, how do I offer my strength for good?

It’s during the warrior stage that a masculine heart comes to see what is really going on—to discern the devices and tactics of the unholy trinity: Satan, the false self (a.k.a. the flesh), and this fallen world. So begins the man’s training to both guard his heart and wield his strength for others.

Now is the time when a young man learns there are things worth fighting for, things that need a strong presence and voice:

A cause—the advancing of God’s kingdom, kindness, fairness, care for the less fortunate, and a voice and presence for the poor, marginalized, or abused. A cause always involves people.
People—siblings, parents, and friends, as well as those a man may not know but who need an advocate or new friend.
Principles and character—the opportunities and challenges of learning how to care. The warrior’s weapons are honesty, integrity, kindness, courage, and, above all else, love.

In addition to a cause, every warrior needs a good king to fight under; someone to teach him mission, vision, and strategy in day-to-day life and in the spiritual realm; someone who is caring and kind and can walk him through the stages of Boyhood and explorer, and then step confidently into warrior, providing a foundational relationship with his true self and a healthy environment in which to learn to fight. Jesus did this with his disciples. Today, Jesus wants the job as the King you will fight under. He has placed small-k kings, both good and bad, on your path to show you how, and how not to one day care for the hearts in your kingdom. We can learn from both good and bad kings, but it’s at this stage we need Jesus as the King of kings to step into his place in our lives.

The warrior's heart is wounded when there is no battle to fight—when we’re told that to be assertive is bad, that to be passive is godly, and that there is never a time to rock the boat or confront others in love, fierce love if necessary. That’s not how Jesus lived; he rocked boats, redrew lines, and confronted others redemptively.

Warriors need to be trained in how to fight! The warrior spirit in you and me is good and is placed in us for noble and valiant purposes. We must learn how to be dangerous for good, wielding a fierce loving kindness. Jesus fought and still fights for you because your enemy is real; Jesus wants you to join him in the fight first for your own heart, and then the fight for others.

As you ponder all this with God today, consider asking Him:

Father, would you show me who was there to fight for me? And who was there to love, lead, and encourage me by showing me how to fight?

Jesus, when did I learn—when did I observe or experience firsthand, or even secondhand—how to fight for my own heart or the heart of another?

Spirit, what was I taught about “fighting,” and about offering my own strength for good? How is that impacting the way I engage and fight for my own heart or for others today?

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Healing Along the Masculine Journey

Men, you are invited to step with courage and hope into an exploration of your story through the Six Stages of the Masculine Journey, and ask God these critical questions: Who am I? Where am I? What is the way home? In this six-day plan, you will venture through each stage, exploring God’s desire to heal you from past wounds so that you can move forward living free.

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