Shame and Fear

What is the last thing you did on a device that led to shame and regret? I’m not writing only about porn, although statistically, just about every person over age eight has seen it. Maybe you posted something you wish you hadn’t, sent a text while too emotional, or spent money you didn’t have.

We’ve all been there.

The Bible has a story about people creating technology to cover their shame, but God reacts in a surprising way.

Before you read it, here are some helpful details.

First, the characters:

•The LORD God (Yahweh God): Notice the small capital letters. Later in a book called Exodus, someone asks God, “What’s your name?” He responds: “I am who I am,” or shortened, “I am,” or “Yahweh.” To some people, this name is so sacred (set apart), they refuse to say it out loud. It implies that he’s the source of life and breath for all creatures, and very personal and relational in nature.

•The Serpent: Although created by God, he represents the opposite of God’s best. He uses questions and trickery to convince the woman and man that God’s holding out on them.

•The Woman: She’s the first woman, later named Eve, which means “life,” because all descendants of the world will come from her.

•The Man: He’s the first man, Eve’s husband, and his name, Adam, basically means “Dirt-man” because he was created from clay and the LORD God’s divine breath.

•The Trees: One is the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil, and the other is the Tree of Life.

Second, the historical context:

In ancient history, there are different stories of gods creating the world. Typically, they include violent scenes of war, and the world is formed from the body parts of a dead deity. Gross? Yes. Weird? Probably. Scientific? Not so much. People are then created to make life easier for the gods, like slaves.

Finally, the Bible’s context:

The Bible’s account of creation is unique. There’s only one God. He doesn’t cause chaos but creates the world with order and beauty (Genesis 1:2). The LORD God creates people and gives them a purpose—to work together with him to take care of his beautiful and abundant world. He warned them to avoid the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil because it would harm them.

Open a Bible and read Genesis 3:1-8.

Discuss these questions or journal your responses.

1. What did you notice in the story? Was there anything surprising? Anything that didn’t make sense or bothered you? Anything hard to believe?

2. How does the serpent convince the woman to eat the fruit? Where was the man during this interaction?

3. Take note of these words in verse 6: convinced, saw, wanted, took, ate, and gave. Do any of these words relate to your experiences of regret and shame?

4. Where did you see technology, something created to solve a problem, in the story?

The man and woman took fig leaves and created clothing to cover their nakedness. They then hid from the LORD God in the trees, afraid. Today, we might do something like quickly close an Incognito tab.

If you’re like me, your heart beats faster when the desire to do something wrong seems impossible to resist. We’re also hyperalert to anyone who might notice. Waves of shame, fear, and regret move in afterward. And when others are involved? We blame each other and try to cover our mistakes.

But the LORD God’s response to people doing the opposite of his best (the Bible calls this sin) is surprising. For Adam and Eve, the LORD God searches for them, points out what’s wrong, and provides a plan to restore them. He even creates real clothes to cover their shame and fear. There’s also a promise embedded in the story: a future son of the woman will hold the serpent accountable (Genesis 3:15). This points to Jesus, the LORD God as a human, centuries later, when he’s stripped naked, publicly shamed, and executed on a tree (Galatians 3:13) to make right the wrongs of evil, sin, and death.

When we do something wrong, God responds the same way to us: He comes close, addresses sin, forgives, and restores.

End with this prayer and these invitations:

A Prayer for Freedom from Self-Destructive Habits

God of compassion, please forgive me for my self-destructive and compulsive behaviors. My Savior, who rescues me from shame and fear, remind me that you do not condemn me, and help me not condemn myself. My Shield, please defend me from temptation and deliver me from evil. Surround me with your grace that is sufficient for my weakness, your love that covers my sin, and your kindness that invites me to find freedom and victory.

1. Use tech well: Turn off your phone and put it in another room at least one hour before bed.

2. Draw closer to God/others: Instead of your phone being the last thing you interact with at night, memorize Psalm 4:8 so you can say it after the lights go out: “In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, O Lord, will keep me safe.”