2 Are Better Than 1: Uncover Your Marriage Purposeعينة

Why Are We so Different?

A Timeless Truth

Devaluing one another’s difference leads to dishonor … dishonor instigates dissension … and, dissension precedes destruction.

One thing’s for certain: Marriage affords plenty of opportunity for offense. What once caught our intrigue, if not protected, can easily cause our irritation. It’s found in all the “He never talks. She never shuts up. He’s so particular. She never pays attention to details. He’s a night owl. She gets up before the rooster. He flies by the seat of his pants. She schedules next year’s spring cleaning,” and thus it goes on and on. There is a myriad of trivial differences that discourage and distract couples from their purpose.

Be on guard. A house divided against itself will fall (Mark 3:24−25). Hold up. Don’t breeze by this familiar truth. If we devalue one another, we eventually dishonor one another. If we dishonor one another, then dissension grows between us. When dissension escalates, destruction becomes inevitable.

One of the greatest opportunities presented in marriage is appreciating our spouse’s differences—not just tolerating them, but actually celebrating them.

So, why did God make us so different?

No doubt you’ve read the Proverb, “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another” (27:17). As believers, we tend to celebrate this great saying with a high five or a chest-bump sort of merriment. But in our enthusiasm we sometimes overlook the reality of the process. Think about it for a moment. For one piece of iron to sharpen another, friction is imperative. Sharpening occurs as one smooth, sharp edge of iron rubs against a separate rough edge of iron. As the two edges connect, the rough edge grinds away to reveal a smooth, sharp edge. The differences, not the similarities, supply the friction necessary to produce the sharpening. Hmm, sound familiar?

In a marriage relationship, God intended diversity and desires for us to celebrate and leverage one another’s differences. In 1 Corinthians, Paul encourages believers to embrace their unique design and reminds that God designed each one distinctly, just as He desired (12:15-18).

As you pursue discovering God’s purpose for your marriage, remember your differences will make you stronger and empower you to accomplish more together than you ever could apart.

Take a moment to ask: Have I made my spouse my opponent or my partner? How could I better celebrate their design?