David's BFF

By Alessandra Velsor

“So Jonathan made a covenant with the house of David, saying, ‘May the Lord call David’s enemies to account.’ And Jonathan had David reaffirm his oath out of love for him, because he loved him as he loved himself.”—1 Samuel 20:16–17 (NIV)

As CS Lewis says,“Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one.’” It may be easier to find a connection or that special spark with someone at first, but we can all agree that it takes commitment, trust, and vulnerability to maintain a friendship and for it to last a lifetime!

So far, we’ve witnessed the beginning of what CS Lewis describes as an example when David and Jonathan become friends two chapters ago, and then it progresses to a best friendship (1 Samuel 18:1) or, as we know it these days, to being BFFs or best friends forever!

Jonathan is trapped between two people he deeply loves: his father and his friend David. David is currently being persecuted by his best friend’s father, and he’s desperately trying to understand why Saul is against him and wants him dead. Saul knows God has chosen David to succeed him and his pride has taken him to a place of no return. It doesn’t help that David has married into his family, and his son is friends with his enemy. But Jonathan is not privy to Saul’s true intentions with David, and in today’s passage, Jonathan finally learns the truth. Most importantly, David solidifies his friendship with Jonathan when he finds him loyal, making this the best biblical friendship ever(after Jesus being our friend, of course!).

Jonathan commits to his friendship when he offers to do whatever it takes to help David. This is the defining moment we can distinguish between a friend and a true best friend. When Jonathan hears of how his father’s been treating David, he commits to helping him, even if he still can’t conceive the thought of his father wanting to harm his friend.

In Proverbs 17:17 (NIV), we’re reminded that “a friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.”In troubling times, we learn who our real friends are because we get to see who shows up! This is why some of us refer to Jesus as our true best friend, someone who has laid down his life for us (John 15:13).

Without truth or vulnerability, the foundation of trust comes crumbling down in a friendship. Jonathan promises to be truthful to his friend, admitting that if he thought his friend was truly in danger, he would most certainly tell him. It takes a lot of courage for David to confide in his friend with the sad reality of the target Saul has placed on his back. These friends make a deal to see what Saul’s true intentions are with David: If Saul loses his temper over David missing dinner with the king, then Jonathan is to send word to David that he is, in fact, in trouble.

Today’s passage ends with both friends making a covenant to care for each other’s well-being. And not to spoil what happens, but they do keep their word: Jonathan protects and saves David’s life, and David returns the favor by protecting Jonathan’s son, Mephibosheth, in 2 Samuel. Saul’s hatred towards David or Jonathan’s loyalty to his father doesn’t come in the way, but fortifies the foundation of the friendship. Also, you’ll see that when David finally ascends the throne, there isn’t even an ounce of bad blood between the two BFFs!

Pause: What makes your best friend your BFF?

Practice: Make a sacrifice for a friend this week—buy them coffee or lunch or help them with an important task.

Pray: Jesus, thank You for being my truest friend and always looking out for me. Create in me a heart that looks for those who need friendship, as well as a desire to find community. I want to love You will all my heart, mind, and soul and love my neighbors and those You’ve placed in my life as I do myself. You’ve taught us to lay down our lives for our friends, and I want to live daily with that desire to put others first. Humble me so I can follow You best for the rest of my days. Amen.