Find Hope in God's Unfailing LoveНамуна

It Matters How You Say Something

“Thoughtless words can wound as deeply as any sword, but wisely spoken words can heal.” Proverbs 12:18 (GNT)

When you plan to lovingly confront someone, you have to think about what you’ll say, when you’ll say it, and how you’ll say it. There are three things to consider if you want the message to get through to the person you love.

1. Say it tactfully.

You’re never persuasive when you’re abrasive. If you say something offensively, then it will be received defensively. But the more pleasant your words, the more persuasive you’ll be.

2. Say it lovingly.

Don’t beat people up with the truth! Say it in a loving way. And how do you know if you’re saying it in a loving way? When it’s for their benefit, not yours.

3. Say it gently.

Being gentle means lowering your voice when you talk to someone and showing humility. You can even qualify your approach: “I may be totally wrong about this, but . . .” or “I’m certainly not perfect, however . . .” Gently state how we all need help at some point, and express your love and concern for the person.

When you plan how you’re going to confront someone in love, remember this equation: Truth + Tact + Timing = Transformation.