Trusting God with Your Future

The summer before my wedding was supposed to be about new beginnings. My college sweetheart and then-fiancé Moses and I stood on the brink of a life we’d dreamed of together. But instead of joyful anticipation, I felt an ache I couldn’t ignore.

I wanted to be excited and secure in this new season. But all I felt was the sharp pull of contradiction between the life I had imagined and the one I was entering.

Both of my parents were born and raised in the Philippines. They urged my sisters and me to seize every opportunity in America. While I wasn’t opposed to marriage, I didn’t dream of wedding dresses. I dreamed of journalism, of telling stories that mattered.

Meanwhile, Moses felt like God was leading him to full-time missionary work with Cru’s high school ministry. I wasn’t so sure. Moses never pressured me but I followed the Lord’s leading. I applied to become a full-time missionary to the public high schools in New York City. To be honest, I submitted my Cru application reluctantly, yet obediently. I knew it could cost me my writing career. I hoped I could do both, but deep down, I knew something had to change.

Then I sensed the Holy Spirit nudging me: “Follow your husband.” I was angry. Why would God give me a dream only to take it away?

Eventually, I said yes to full-time ministry. I felt peace but also grief. I still mourn the career I dreamed about. Some days, the ache is sharp. Other days, I glimpse something new—unexpected, quieter, but still beautiful.

Two months after our wedding, I found out I was pregnant with our oldest son. Then came four more kids, back-to-back. Motherhood brought its own upheaval but also a renewed purpose.

Maybe you feel the ache of dreams deferred or rewritten. That doesn’t mean God got it wrong. It may be that you’re standing at a crossroads, wondering if trusting God means losing yourself. I’ve been there. What helped me wasn’t clarity but growing trust in God’s character.

Following Jesus doesn’t always bring answers. But it does bring Him. Even buried dreams can bloom again in His hands.

If you’re wrestling with disappointment, take heart. God hasn’t abandoned your story. He’s still writing it—with love, purpose, and your good in mind.

Application Questions:

• What dreams have you been holding onto that God may be reshaping?
• Where is He asking you to trust His leading, even when the path feels unclear?

Prayer:

"God, thank You that Your plans for me are good—even when I don’t understand them. Help me trust Your timing and surrender my own expectations. Shape my heart to follow You, not just the dream. I believe You are leading me to hope. Amen."

Marilette Sanchez
New York City, Filipino-American
Family Life