No More Mr. Nice Guy: Saying Goodbye to Doormat Christianityಮಾದರಿ

You Have the Right to Be Human

“But when He saw the multitudes, He was moved with compassion for them, because they were weary and scattered, like sheep having no shepherd” (Matthew 9:36 NKJV).

“For He knows our frame; He remembers that we are dust” (Psalm 103:14 NKJV).

In some Christian circles it almost goes without saying that real Christians don’t sin (or, if they do, they can’t let anyone know). The fact is high, unrealistic expectations can kill you. They are dangerous to your health. God works in a process, and if you have the expectation of being at the end of the process before you have gone through the process, you are going to suffer great disappointment. God isn’t finished with you yet.

Perfection is not attainable in this world. If you think it is, you are going to end up a neurotic Christian. Instant goodness, instant power and instant perfection . . . It simply doesn’t work that way. While you ought to feel properly guilty when you don’t measure up to God’s standard, you ought to be properly relieved to know that you didn’t surprise God when you didn’t measure up to His standard, and that He has made provision for you at the foot of the cross.

Do you know what it means to be human? It means that sometimes you are angry and withdrawn. It means that sometimes you will be tired. Sometimes you will just want to go away and cry. Sometimes you will want to junk the whole thing and walk away.

Being human also means that you say stupid things, do stupid things and think stupid things. It means that sometimes you will feel silly. Sometimes you won’t want to go to church. Sometimes you will want to cuss.

Christians bleed. We have family problems. We are in pain. We struggle. I believe that when a non-Christian has cancer or is in great pain, a Christian has cancer or is in great pain . . . so that the world can see the difference.

When I was growing up, the sentence I heard probably more than any other was this: “Stephen is not living up to his potential.” That was true, of course. It was always true; it is still true; it will always be true (until I become like Him in heaven). There is always more that I could do. I could always be better than I am. I could always love Him more and serve Him better.

Now, when my brothers and sisters in Christ motivate me to a better walk with Christ by reminding me that I’m really not trying very hard, they have done me a service. However, when they have selfish, vested interest in their motivation of me, it ceases to be motivation and becomes manipulation.

The writer of Hebrews, who spoke about the sacrificial system in the old covenant, points to the difference between the sacrifice of Christ, once and for all, and the sacrifices that had to be made in the temple. Then he says, “But in those sacrifices there is a reminder of sin every year” (Hebrews 10:3). In other words, we don’t need to be reminded over and over that we are sinners who fall short. The death of Christ removed the need to be constantly reminded.

The next time someone tells you that you aren’t living up to your potential, tell them, “Of course, I’m not living up to my potential and if it is okay with you, I think I won’t live up to it for a while longer.”

On the authority of God’s Word, I give you permission to be human.