The Coach Approach: A Better Way to Live, Lead, and Leave a Legacyಮಾದರಿ

INQUISITIVE QUESTIONER

Bob is an open, honest, and transparent man of God. When I first met him, he shared that he was a member of Teller Anonymous and had been for most of his life. When he asked if I belonged to the group, I felt embarrassed, realizing I was part of something I had never even heard of before!

I am currently in the process of recovering from being a lifelong "teller." Once I recognized this tendency in myself, I knew I had to change for the sake of my relationships. This realization prompted me to focus on leading with questions instead of jumping in to speak, which often led to missing out on meaningful two-way conversations. As my family, friends, and coworkers began to notice the shift in my communication, I bid farewell to my membership in Teller Anonymous.

Over time, I have observed that good tellers often create followers who struggle to think independently. In contrast, inquisitive questioners inspire leaders who can think for themselves and devise solutions, even when their boss, coach, or parents are not present. Leading by telling does not encourage your team to “think outside the box.”

In Matthew 7:7-8, we are encouraged to keep asking, keep searching, and keep knocking. Not keep telling! It states, “Keep asking, and it will be given to you. Keep searching, and you will find. Keep knocking, and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who searches finds, and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.”

One of my favorite questions is the “A.W.E.” question, which stands for "And what else?" This question encourages others to delve deeper into the topic being discussed. By using it two or three times consecutively, you can uncover valuable insights from those around you. Give it a go and see how it ignites more meaningful conversations.

Pause

• Do you tend to be a teller or an inquisitive questioner?
• What changes need to occur in your mind and heart to become an inquisitive questioner?

Practice

• Identify three situations where you find yourself telling instead of listening. What prompted you to resort to telling rather than asking questions?
• This week, use "And what else?" to help draw out what God has placed within others.

Prayer

Lord, please cultivate humility and curiosity within me, fueling my desire to ask more questions. Help me to recognize the value of drawing out from others what You have placed inside them. I want to excel at asking questions. Please guide me, Lord. In Jesus' name, Amen.