God's Heart Breaks, Too

By Samantha Rodriguez

“Samuel said to Saul, ‘I am the one the Lord sent to anoint you king over his people Israel; so listen now to the message from the Lord. This is what the Lord Almighty says: “I will punish the Amalekites for what they did to Israel when they waylaid them as they came up from Egypt. Now go, attack the Amalekites and totally destroy all that belongs to them. Do not spare them; put to death men and women, children and infants, cattle and sheep, camels and donkeys.”’ So Saul summoned the men and mustered them at Telaim—two hundred thousand foot soldiers and ten thousand from Judah. Saul went to the city of Amalek and set an ambush in the ravine. Then he said to the Kenites, ‘Go away, leave the Amalekites so that I do not destroy you along with them; for you showed kindness to all the Israelites when they came up out of Egypt.’ So the Kenites moved away from the Amalekites. Then Saul attacked the Amalekites all the way from Havilah to Shur, near the eastern border of Egypt. He took Agag king of the Amalekites alive, and all his people he totally destroyed with the sword. But Saul and the army spared Agag and the best of the sheep and cattle, the fat calves and lambs—everything that was good. These they were unwilling to destroy completely, but everything that was despised and weak they totally destroyed. Then the word of the Lord came to Samuel: ‘I regret that I have made Saul king, because he has turned away from me and has not carried out my instructions.’ Samuel was angry, and he cried out to the Lord all that night. Early in the morning Samuel got up and went to meet Saul, but he was told, ‘Saul has gone to Carmel. There he has set up a monument in his own honor and has turned and gone on down to Gilgal.’ When Samuel reached him, Saul said, ‘The Lord bless you! I have carried out the Lord’s instructions.’ But Samuel said, ‘What then is this bleating of sheep in my ears? What is this lowing of cattle that I hear?’ Saul answered, ‘The soldiers brought them from the Amalekites; they spared the best of the sheep and cattle to sacrifice to the Lord your God, but we totally destroyed the rest.’”—1 Samuel 15:1–11 (NIV)

Does reading this give you déjà vu—the feeling you’ve seen this before? Well, that’s probably because just two chapters ago, in 1 Samuel 13, Saul made a hasty decision that got him the same rebuke from Samuel. In a moment of desperation, Saul decided to impatiently and selfishly perform the sacrifice to prevent more of his men from running away. Afterward, Samuel told him that his foolish disobedience would cause his kingdom not to endure and that God had already sought a new man who would truly be after his own heart.

So now, we’re right back where we started because Saul’s heart clearly didn’t learn its lesson or truly repent. For today; however, I’m going to focus on God’s heart and Samuel instead.

Let’s take another look at today’s story. God gave Saul clear instructions to attack the Amalekites and totally destroy everything. Seems simple enough, right? Well, the Scripture says that Saul not only took the king captive instead of killing him, but he also saw that there was good livestock in the land and took that as well. He defied the Lord’s commands out of selfish interest and greed. I don’t know if Saul thought he could hide it from God. Perhaps he thought he could come up with an excuse that seemed holy or pardonable and convince God that what he did was okay. Whatever the case is, Saul was clearly mistaken! God saw it all, and it hurt His heart immensely.

When God told Samuel He regretted making Saul king, it was His way of using terms that would be understood by humans to share the deep emotions He felt. Although God knew the state of Saul’s heart all along, He still watched Saul make choice after choice to rebel and disregard Him, which surely hurt. These terms allow us to see that our actions can hurt God.

When God speaks to Samuel about this, we also see that Samuel felt intense frustration and grief. He shared God’s heart, and he hurt when he saw others rejecting and abusing God’s love and guidance. Samuel allowed himself to be fully raw with his emotions as he cried out to the Lord all night! I’m sure we’ve all been there.

Why does this matter? Because of two important truths: 1) Our God can empathize with us and isn’t a stranger to emotions, and 2) we can also come to Him with all our emotions as a result.

We serve a God who understands what it's like to get His heart broken. And most of the time, we’re the ones breaking His heart! When we realize God truly desires for us to obey Him because it's what’s best for us, it changes our perspective. He isn’t some tyrant God on a power trip. He’s our all-loving, perfectly holy, and ever-present Father! He’s deeply acquainted with us and wants us to lean in and be deeply acquainted with Him, too.

This is the life Samuel lived. A life so close to God that his heart was transformed to be more like his Father’s. When we live this way, our sin will break our hearts, draw us close to God in humility, and our closeness to Him will help us truly pursue a life of righteousness, which is the best place to be!

Pause: Think about how your perspective changes to know that God’s heart breaks for us when we disobey, stray, and disregard him. What does this show you about Him?

Practice: Take a moment today to write down the things that break God’s heart. Then, pray God would break your heart for the same things. It’s a hard prayer, but it’s worth it. Do you want God to transform your heart?

Pray: My gracious Father, thank You for Your love. I’m sorry for the ways I break Your heart. I pray You’d break my heart in the same ways, for the same things that break Yours! As you do that, help me know how to move forward in Your same love. Show me how to love others in grace and truth while loving myself in the same way, too! I don’t want to run away from confronting loved ones or myself because that’s not grace, but I also don’t want to run towards judgment in the name of love when it's from a place of unresolved anger or self-righteousness. Mature me in this area Father. I trust You and love You! Amen.