Stripped: Trusting God When He Allows Others to Hurt Youনমুনা

THE DECEPTION OF PAIN

There will always be someone better off and someone worse off than you. It’s like those surveys you get at the doctor. “On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you describe your pain?” Uh, as compared to what? I’ve had tongue sores that I would categorize a 10 because of the location where they scraped against my teeth.

Apparently, I have what some call a low pain-tolerance level. How can we quantify what others tolerate compared to us and our exact situations? There could be so many factors, including emotional ones, when it comes to how we feel pain.

Why do certain things affect us deeply, while others can be easily forgotten? Our lives and the exact conditions we each go through are unique and unrepeatable. Unless we share the same experiences with others, we have no real way of knowing how we would react in a given situation. It’s futile; my pain is my pain, your pain is your pain. Nevertheless, we can have empathy.

We can relate to the byproducts of pain and brokenness: the heartache, tears, affected self-esteem, sadness, and barrage of emotions shared by those who’ve suffered, regardless of what caused the suffering. Around the world there are people facing much harder situations than yours and mine, but that does not undermine the validity of what we undergo.

This crisis increased my patience, understanding, and compassion for others. We don’t know what people around us are walking through, regardless of how cool, perfect, or ideal their social media profiles appear.

Pain comparison is defeated by seeking God’s presence consistently. His grace is enough for those struggling with rejection as much as it is available for someone who has been sex trafficked, kidnapped, beaten, or who had a loved one murdered or hurt by others. Whatever the suffering, He is able and sufficient to heal it all.

Jesus said, “I have told you these things so that in me you may have peace. You will have suffering in this world. Be courageous! I have conquered the world” (John 16:33, CSB).

Although suffering is a consequence of living in a sinful world, my deepest hope was to be spared from the devastating kind of suffering. Yet, there I was, stripped to the core. And knowing ahead of time suffering was inevitable did not make it any easier. I was hurt, but I also longed desperately for the comfort that only comes from Him.

God reminded me of Saul, Israel’s first king, whom God chose and anointed to lead the Israelites. In fact, the Spirit of God, which in the Old Testament filled people only in specific moments, came over Saul and the Scriptures say he was “transformed” (1 Samuel 10, CSB). God’s will for Saul was good, but Saul made wrong choices, igniting a trail of destruction that consequently cost him the kingdom.

God reminded me that just because someone else’s decisions affect me and provoke hardship, they are not a reflection of His will, but a manifestation of other people’s free will. The Holy Spirit reminded me of His promise that “all things work together for the good of those who love God, who are called according to his purpose” (Romans 8:28, CSB). This promise assures us that even through turmoil and distress, God can, and will, work things for our good. How He does that is a project-management masterpiece that only a sovereign God can orchestrate! Sometimes, the hidden blessings that come with brokenness are made evident quickly. Other times, like in Joseph’s story, it can be years before they are revealed.

Hard circumstances become the center of our universe and everything else pales in comparison to what we are going through. However, none of us are citizens of one-person islands. Our stories are intertwined and connected to hundreds of people around us, people that came before us, and people that will follow. What we do affects others, whether intentionally or not, and what others do and decide, impacts us too. God works within the parameters of our free will to fulfill His purposes for us, the world, and those who cross paths with us.

We can not gauge His love according to the presence or absence of heartache in our lives. God’s permissibility does not invalidate His love.

If His permissibility were a reflection of His love, we could argue that He didn’t love His son, Jesus:

“Then the governor’s soldiers took Jesus into the Praetorium and gathered the whole company of soldiers around him. They stripped him and put a scarlet robe on him, and then twisted together a crown of thorns and set it on his head. They put a staff in his right hand. Then they knelt in front of him and mocked him. “Hail, king of the Jews!” they said. They spit on him, and took the staff and struck him on the head again and again. After they had mocked him, they took off the robe and put his own clothes on him. Then they led him away to crucify him.” (Matthew 27:27-31, NIV, emphasis mine)

God permitted Jesus to be stripped! If we discredit God’s love under the argument that it’s not real because He allows sorrow or difficulties, then based on that reasoning, we must conclude that God did not love His own son. But we know the opposite is true!

God’s love was unchanging, but His purposes for the world had to allow Jesus’ stripping. Jesus described this permissibility when He was arrested and Peter struck one of the men with his sword:

“Or do you think that I cannot call on my Father, and he will provide me here and now with more than twelve legions of angels? How, then, would the Scriptures be fulfilled that say it must happen this way?” (Matthew 26:53, 54 CSB)

If Jesus had changed His mind about dying for our sins, God would have instantly sent those angels to fight on His behalf. However, His purpose for mankind HAD to allow this painful part of the plan. Did that change God’s love for Jesus? No, rather it demonstrated His great love for US.

Life looks different through the lens that sees a Savior who chose to submit himself to suffering precisely because His love was too profound and relentless to allow us to remain lost in our transgressions.

There is no better place to run to with our brokenness than to the God who understands what it is like to be subjected to life’s frailty and hardships. He understands us because He was a man of sorrows, stripped by the very ones He came to redeem. Yet, the outcome of His pain was our salvation. His wounds and crucifixion were the price for our mess ups.

If God allowed Jesus to be stripped, then I can choose to trust Him when He allows situations I don’t understand. His permissibility does not invalidate His love for me. His permissibility responds to His sovereignty and justice.