Stripped: Trusting God When He Allows Others to Hurt Youনমুনা

ISAAC (THE GRANDFATHER)

After Isaac grew up, he married Rebekah, who was also barren. God appeared to Isaac and reminded him of the promise He made to his father, Abraham, and included Isaac in the promise too.

Isaac repeated his father’s mistakes and lied about Rebekah being his wife out of fear for his life. The story gets even more interesting when we meet Rebekah’s side of the family, namely her brother, Laban, an unscrupulous deceiver and liar.

After twenty years of marriage, Rebekah became pregnant with twins. God told her that the oldest (Esau) would serve the youngest (Jacob) and, just like Sarah attempted to self-fulfill the promise, so did Rebekah. She encouraged Jacob (who had already tricked his brother Esau into giving him his birthright as the oldest son) to deceive his blinding father Isaac, by dressing up as Esau in order to get the blessing the oldest sons received from their fathers.

Esau was so mad over this, he wanted to kill Jacob. In response, Rebekah helped Jacob escape to uncle Laban’s land. On his way there, God appeared to Jacob in a dream and reminded him of the promise He had made to Abraham, and extended that promise to him, just as he had done with his father Isaac.

I wondered why God gave them the same promise over and over. I believe that, in part, it was because after all the things they went through and the messes they got themselves into, they might have assumed that promise might be null or no longer applicable. But God is not limited by our mistakes. He is able and powerful to work through, around, and despite mess ups. His purposes are much bigger, they won’t be thwarted by mere humans.

JACOB (THE FATHER)

At Laban’s house, Jacob fell in love with his cousin Rachel, and agreed to work for Laban for seven years in exchange for her hand in marriage. This is where the drama reaches telenovela levels. After seven years, which seemed like only a few days for Jacob because he loved her so much (Genesis 29:20, NIV), Laban played a horrible trick on Jacob on his wedding day—he gave him his oldest daughter, Leah, instead of Rachel.

We don’t know exactly how they pulled it off, but they must have tricked Rachel and kept her locked in a room away from the wedding. Imagine how traumatic that must have been for her! After waiting seven years to wed, it was Leah in Jacob’s arms on her honeymoon.

Leah knew Jacob was in love with her sister, yet she nodded her head in approval, dancing and celebrating through the party, playing her role with no regard for Rachel’s feelings.

How did they keep Jacob from realizing the eyes and voice behind the veil weren’t Rachel’s? They probably got Jacob drunk, and told Leah to keep quiet, because Jacob didn’t notice it was not Rachel until the following morning…yikes.

You have to be a real piece of work to do that to your daughters. Jacob was furious. Laban justified his deceit with the excuse that he first needed to give the oldest daughter in marriage, which he could have mentioned at some point during those seven years! But no biggie, Jacob, you can have Rachel too if you finish your honeymoon with Leah and work for your wonderful father-in-law another seven years. Easy.

As if things couldn’t get worse, Jacob not only had two sister wives, but Rachel, the one he loved, was barren. This sets off terribly sad “baby-wars” between the sisters. Leah was having children left and right, but Rachel had none. So, in the same way that Sarah found a surrogate mother for Abraham, Rachel gave her servant Bilhah to Jacob, so she would have children on behalf of Rachel. This didn’t suit well with Leah, who took her servant, Zilpah, and gave her to Jacob so she could have more children through her. Jacob wasn’t innocent in all of this; he could have refused.

Picture the tension between those four women; comparing themselves, jealous of each other, arguing every day and fighting for Jacob’s attention. Their self-worth was intrinsically linked to one man’s affection and their capacity to bear children. The family dynamics were explosive.

A few miserable years later, there were 10 sons and one daughter between three of the women. The amount of drama in chapters 29 and 30 source enough material to produce a television series that would make jaws drop even in our modern times. Eventually, Rachel, the loved wife, got pregnant and bore Jacob a son. Can you guess who? Bingo. It was Joseph.

After 20 years, God appeared to Jacob and told him to go back home. So Jacob set out with his four wives, children, and livestock. Esau (the offended twin brother) found out Jacob was coming, and went out to meet Jacob in the company of 400 men, also known as a small army.

Jacob panicked when he heard Esau was on his way. Remember, Esau wanted to kill him the last time they saw each other, so Jacob assumed Esau was probably mad, which must be the reason he’s coming with a battalion.

But there was a surprise for Esau: Jacob was no longer the man his brother remembered. Uncle Laban gave him a taste of his own medicine; he paid the price of trickery and deceit. He had 20 years to reconsider his actions—the consequences of his many poor choices were stark reminders.

Even with all his flaws, Jacob recognized that God, the God of his father and grandfather, was with him. The words in chapter 32 verses 9-12 reveal the transformation of a man who, a couple of decades earlier, played dress up to force his way into obtaining God’s blessing.

He sent hundreds of animals and gifts to Esau and as he got closer, he divided his camp into two groups as a safety measure: if Esau attacked the first camp, the other camp had a chance to flee.

This is where we run into a key verse that I believe helps us better understand the relationship between Joseph and his brothers in chapter 37.

“Jacob looked up and there was Esau, coming with his four hundred men; so he divided the children among Leah, Rachel, and the two female servants. He put the female servants and their children in front, Leah and her children next, and Rachel and Joseph in the rear.” (Genesis 33: 1, 2, NIV)

That has to be one of the saddest moments in the history of this family. It’s becoming clearer why Joseph’s brothers hated him so much. Imagine that moment from the perspective of the children. They must have been terrified as they witnessed the commotion and Jacob’s attempts to keep them safe. But then, their father did something that broke their tender hearts: he lined them up. He could have sent them ALL away, hidden them ALL in a cave, or simply had them ALL huddle in a group. Instead, he lined them up in what seemed to be the order of preference. He was prepared to let Esau take the servants and their kids first, followed by Leah and her kids, in order to spare Rachel and Joseph, who will hopefully have time to escape. If I had been one of those kids, I would have remembered that night for the rest of my life. Evidently someone did since it made it into Genesis.

Thankfully, Esau was also a different man and his intention (whether or not influenced by Jacob’s gifts) was not to harm Jacob and his family, but to welcome them. There were no fights or deaths that night, only scarred hearts that would later derivate hatred towards their own flesh and blood. This was a huge revelation that opened my eyes to perceive new dimensions in the story. Tomorrow, we’ll talk about God’s purpose and the patterns in the family.