Long-Distance Grandparenting

You moved to a warmer climate. Your son and his family moved out of state to advance his career. Your daughter went to school out of state, fell in love with a local boy, and never moved back home. Suddenly, you’re a long-distance grandparent.

Even worse, the “other” grandparents live near the kids, and you feel left out. When you do get to see that growing family, you rush to cram as much as you can into a few days. At your place, there’s never enough room. At their place, you feel like an intrusion. Motels are impersonal—and expensive. However, your children and grandchildren need to feel your regular, consistent commitment and love. How can you make that happen?

You need a plan to help turn the frustration of long-distance grandparenting into a blessing.

First, communicate creatively via phone calls, e-mail, or text messages. One positive result of the COVID-19 pandemic is that Zoom and other face-to-face digital options are now user-friendly and routine. Keep track of your grandkids’ interests and schedules so that your conversations can go deeper than “How’s the weather?” Also, the post office is still operational, and they could use your business.

Second, become a desirable destination point. Add kid-friendly features to your home and yard. Research local events and destinations. Open your home—for an extended visit—to one or two of your grandkids at a time. If you can, offer to pay the airfare.

Third, realize that kids are busy, so don’t panic if they can’t always visit or talk. The last thing you want to do is add guilt or judgment to the communication you do have.

Fourth, trust God to provide a conduit for your love to flow easily over the miles. It’s an opportunity to share and reflect God’s love in your nearby community—to family, friends, and strangers. Too many long-distance grandparents focus on their loss, rather than on the gifts and opportunities they have. Make the most of this season that feels like a separation. When really it can be an opportunity for you to grow in your faith and build other relationships in new and exciting ways.

WHAT ABOUT YOU?

In the next few months—or the next few days—there will be opportunities for you to reach out and be an encouragement to one or more of your grandchildren, whether they live nearby or far away, in a manner you had not previously considered. But only if you look for it. Your only limit is your own imagination. Make it a quest. Make it fun. Make it a blessing.