Attaching to Our Father Through the Lord’s Prayer by Cyd and Geoff HolsclawНамуна

Noticing Where You Pray From

Have you ever felt like you live in a different world than someone you love? Things don’t feel or look the same from your perspective.

We talk about this phenomenon using the language of landscapes—the place you find yourself because of your early attachment relationships. God designed each of us to be born into a family that was thrilled to be with us—like the Father, overjoyed and delighted, running to meet us. In a family like that, we grow a strong capacity to be close and connected in relationships. We also grow strong and adventurous as we explore the world and become more independent.

But not all of us are born into families that are excited for our arrival. Some of our families were desperately broken before we arrived. Some of our families fell apart as we were growing. And some of our families felt completely normal until we met the families of friends and noticed just how different everything is.

Depending on how you grew up, you might find yourself incredibly focused on your people—making sure they’re okay and that they’re okay with you. If something is wrong in one of your relationships, you can’t be okay until the relationship is okay. This landscape is a bit like living in a jungle. You are always watching your relationships, never knowing when something might shift or change—just like the jungle does.

Or you might find yourself focusing on projects and keeping to yourself. You don’t really feel an obvious need for relationships. You don’t need people much and you don’t love being needed by others. You kind of do your own thing. This landscape is a bit like living in a desert. You are just doing what you need to do to conserve your energy and make it through your days—just like you need to focus on getting the right things done at the right time in the desert.

If you resonate with the jungle, praying through a structure like the Lord’s Prayer can feel awkward, but it’s good for you to push yourself to focus on all the parts of the prayer for a fuller relationship with your Father. We encourage you to stick with it.

If you find yourself in the desert, you might find it hard to personalize the structure, to get specific about your own life. See if you can stretch yourself to get as personal as possible in your conversation with God.

AS YOU PRAY…

Again, imagine the face of the Father beaming, running toward you, so glad you are here! Ask the Father to help you see if you have tendencies toward the jungle or the desert. As you prepare to pray through the structure of the prayer Jesus taught his disciples, where do you notice resistance? Where do you feel invited or excited? Bring these to your Father as he enjoys being with you.