When Relationships Get ComplicatedНамуна

Worth

Often, we judge how to invest time, energy, and money based on what something is worth. In business, it’s called an ROI, or “return on investment.” If something doesn’t pay off, we get rid of it, stop doing it, or trade it in. But how is value assigned in relationships? How do we determine what’s “worth it” and what isn’t?

Sometimes we don’t know the true value of something until it’s taken away. In his sermon “Building Wise Friendships ,” Dr. Stanley says, “There are many people who have been so rejected, so hurt, and so full of pain that they say, ‘It’s just not worth it.’ Yes it is. It’s worth it to feel anchored by a genuine, true, loving, devoted, loyal friend. But you see, you’ll never grow up until you’re willing to risk being hurt.”

In a sense, the worth of any single relationship comes back to the conviction that relationships themselves are integral to our life. When we value being connected to others, then we are willing to pay high costs and make deep sacrifices. However, the math doesn’t always add up.

Sometimes our own limitations or the strict boundaries we have to draw mean we can’t continue in the relationship in its current state. And in some situations, that might mean we can’t continue at all. If you’re unsure of what the next best step is for you in a particular relationship, seek out wise counsel—especially where marriage is concerned. Talk with a Christlike pastor, elder, or counselor.

REFLECT

• Have you nearly lost a relationship only to realize that the other person was worth fighting for, even through pain and forgiveness? Have you ever had a relationship that didn’t seem to be worth it? How did you define “worth” in that moment?
• Read 1 Corinthians 15:33. What do you think Paul means here? Based on this verse, do you think ending a relationship is ever worth it?
• You can listen to the sermon “Building Wise Friendships ” and others on the InTouch website.