Logs and Specks

“For you will be treated as you treat others. The standard you use in judging is the standard by which you will be judged. And why worry about a speck in your friend’s eye when you have a log in your own?” (Matthew 7:2-3, NLT)

“The eyes of the hunter redden like those of the small prey.” This Ugandan proverb means all people, great and small, experience similar realities and challenges.

How often have you heard people in conflict say things like, “She does not value me at all!” or “He meant to hurt me anyway he could – he is evil!”? The other person is seen as uncooperative, deficient, or unreasonable. Many of us are guilty of making these exaggerations out of frustration. We believe that the other person has ill intentions and is out to get us.

At the same time, we underplay our role in the conflict and the breakdown of the relationship with excuses: “Everyone makes mistakes.” or “I had a bad day.” But we insist that the other person did not simply make a mistake like we did. They, of course, were intentional and calculating, determined to do us harm.

We tend to paint ourselves and our motives as good while doubting or even painting the motives of others as suspect or even evil. This rationale says, “They have a log in their eye; I only have a speck in mine.” The log-and-speck metaphor comes from Jesus’s famous teaching about not judging others and being honest about our own brokenness and responsibility. Take a moment to read this in Matthew 7:1-5.

One place to begin conflict resolution is by honestly assessing our own contribution to the conflict. It may be, as Jesus said, that we have the log in our eye and the speck is in the other person’s.

Reflection

Examine a recent conflict you had. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you honestly evaluate your role in the conflict. Were you able to see your contribution at the time, or only afterward? Why or why not? Pray and ask God to help you see the “logs” in your own eye.