Made New: Rewriting the Story of Rejection Through God's Truthनमूना

Day 3: Avoidance

Avoidance is often the fruit of a deeper root, rejection that convinces us to hide from God, others, and even ourselves in an attempt to shield our wounds. Just like Adam and Eve covered themselves and hid from God in the garden, we often retreat when we feel exposed, unworthy, or not enough.

Rejection can often lead us to believe the lies that cause us to feel as though we’re not enough or that we’re not worthy. We can easily adopt a mentality of operating at a deficit as a way of protecting ourselves. Avoidance is a survival method that attempts to salvage our control of emotional safety that we have over the situation by protecting ourselves from the pain.

Avoidance can reveal itself by producing a fear of vulnerability or self-sabotage. Vulnerability requires openness, but someone who fears rejection may avoid deep connections, challenges, or even opportunities because they subconsciously believe it’s safer to stay hidden, which can lead to self-sabotage of new experiences.

As an educator, I’ve been the first Black administrator in the two schools where I’ve worked. There have been many moments in my personal and professional journey that made me question if I truly belonged in the spaces I was called to lead. Whether it was being the only one in the room who looked like me, carrying the weight of unspoken expectations, or navigating environments where I felt unseen or misunderstood, rejection tried to plant seeds of doubt. In those moments, avoidance crept in, not as laziness or indifference, but as a quiet retreat. I found myself holding back, second-guessing my voice, or shrinking from opportunities, not because I didn’t care, but because I was trying to protect myself from the sting of not being received. Spiritually, I now recognize those moments as battles between the lies of rejection and the truth of my calling. And like Adam in the garden, I’ve learned that hiding might feel safe, but healing begins when I stop avoiding and start showing up fully, faithfully, and unashamed.

So, what do we do when avoidance tries to speak louder than our calling? First, we acknowledge it, naming the areas where we’ve pulled back or hidden because of past rejection. Then, we invite God into those places, trusting that His truth outweighs every lie we’ve believed about our worth. Next, we take intentional steps toward vulnerability, whether it’s speaking up in rooms that intimidate us, showing up authentically in our leadership, or seeking a community that sees and supports us. And finally, we remind ourselves daily that we are not leading from a place of deficit, but from a place of divine assignment. Healing begins when we stop avoiding and start agreeing with what God already knows to be true about us: we are called, we are equipped, and we belong.

Reflection Questions:

• Where have you been retreating or shrinking back in your life, because of fear of rejection or not feeling enough?
• What lies of rejection have you believed that caused you to hide from your God-given calling, and how can you replace them with God’s truth?
• What’s one intentional step you can take this week to show up fully and faithfully, despite fear, in the spaces God has called you to lead or serve?

Prayer:

Father, thank you for another day of gathering in your presence. Thank you for equipping me with your power, strength, wisdom, love, courage, self-control, and correction. Lord, your scripture says that you correct your children because you love them, so I ask that you soften the hearts of your children as you correct them and allow us to receive your correction with love, just as a good father would. Father, I rebuke the spirit of rejection and pray that you will fill your children with your everlasting love. Father, I pray that you help your children to forgive the men and women who have failed to love us correctly.