Setting Up Healthy Boundaries

Reading Joshua 15

This chapter focuses on Judah’s allotted boundaries. Boundaries are important for knowing how far you can go before you run into another's territory. In our lives, we need to have firmly established boundaries that will protect us.

It’s going to happen—people will overstep the boundaries of your home, family, ministry, and personal life. When this happens, there is no easy answer. We must address the situation with wisdom and love, communicating clearly and respectfully why we feel our boundaries have been encroached upon negatively.

As a church leader, I'm very careful about meeting individuals on my own without a third party present in the room, because I don't ever want to end up in a compromised situation that could damage my reputation, marriage, or ministry.

Thinking through healthy boundaries in advance of situations can often save us from many trials and heartaches as followers of Jesus. Making choices about what you allow to happen—and not happen—in your home and family are wise things to do. Boundaries help establish who we are and who we will be.

In Joshua 16:10 we read that Israel did not dislodge the Canaanites living in Gezer, and to this day the Canaanites live among the people of Ephraim but are required to do forced labour. It's a reminder to choose your enemies carefully.

The Israelites tolerated the Canaanites living in Gezer, and therefore they never left. Friend, the areas of error that you tolerate in your own life so easily stay forever. There is a proverb which states, “The small fox cubs spoil the vines.” Although cute and cuddly, their gnawing and clawing at the vine stem killed the vine. Don’t ignore the small things.

What do you need to dislodge from your territory? Do it with God’s help, or it will be an ongoing hindrance for all the years to come. A little bit of pain in dealing with certain areas of our lives now may give us complete victory. Don’t give the enemy a foothold in any area of your life.

Meditation

1. Have there been situations in your life where having boundaries in place might have spared you much heartache?

2. Are there Canaanites in your personal Gezer? Considering the wisdom gleaned from Joshua, how can you sensitively and restoratively re-establish those healthy boundaries?

Prayer

Lord, I don’t want to be tripped up because I have not established boundaries in my life that will protect me and the things that are precious to me. Help me to practically put boundaries into place. Reveal to me what is most important in my life and, therefore, where to put extra protection.

Lord, please forgive me for times in my life when I have not put boundaries in place and have paid the price. I ask for Your forgiveness and that I may not repeat the same mistakes. Today, I hereby give notice of eviction to these areas and ask that You send your bailiffs to ensure their certain removal. I don’t want to tolerate these areas anymore; it’s time for them to leave. I ask this in Jesus’ precious name, Amen.

Compromise

Reading Joshua 16

In chapter 15, we saw the importance of boundaries. In chapter 16, we see the equal importance of not compromising with evil. Joshua tolerated the Canaanites still living in the land and influencing the nation—something that would later cost them dearly. Here, we are not referring to casual compromises like where to eat or the colour of the wallpaper—those aren’t a problem. We’re talking about unprincipled compromise—compromise that seeks to pragmatically water down the clear truth of God's Word.

Oxford Languages defines compromise (verb) as:

1. To settle a dispute by mutual concession.

2. To accept standards that are lower than is desirable.

Notice the concepts in these definitions of compromise: “mutual concession,” “lower standard,” “allow,” “give up.”

Israel lowered their standards. Instead of conquering all the land God told them to take, they stopped short and allowed evil to remain in parts of their territory. Instead of worshipping God alone, they made mutual concessions with the nations around them and brought foreign gods into their homes.

What begins as a personal attitude of acceptance toward compromise—within our own lives and the Christian community—can become something more dangerous. This acceptance often shifts into active pressure, encouraging the broader Christian community to agree with, and share in, that same compromise.

Why does this happen?

I think there are two reasons:

1. Satan knows that once a Christian has accepted compromises in their own life, it becomes much harder for them to speak out against that issue anywhere else. Too often, they even begin to advocate for it. Once you’ve seen something in God, you cannot unsee it. You are obligated to walk in that truth.

2. Satan also knows that compromise is one of the fastest ways to keep a dispute going. He convinces Christians that the dispute itself is the sin, not the original sin that caused the conflict. As a result, Christians who would otherwise stand firm often compromise in order to avoid conflict, calling it peace. But peacemaking and peacekeeping are two very different things.

Meditation

1. It was the clarity of Jesus' message that brought attacks against Him. How clear is my message? More importantly, is there a difference between what I say and what I do?

2. When is it right to challenge offence or sin—whether in myself or in others? And if so, with what attitude should I do it? James encourages us to confess our faults to one another (James 5:16). Do I do that? Is there someone in my life to whom I am accountable?

Prayer

Lord, I thank you that You never compromise—not for a moment or in any way. You remained true to Your purpose and true to God in every detail. Because of that, I am now saved through Your sacrifice. I thank You that You are light, and in Your light, we have life. Help me to always walk in that light. And then, in love, help me to be an effective light to those around me, Amen.