Surviving Your Family During the Holidaysનમૂનો

When Love Feels Hard

In Jesus’ day, the road from Jerusalem to Jericho was steep, dusty, and dangerous, the kind of place you didn’t travel alone. Bandits hid in the shadows, waiting for someone distracted or desperate enough to wander by.

One day, a man did.
He was beaten, stripped, and left half-dead in the heat.
Hours passed. A priest came by, saw him, and crossed to the other side.
Then a Levite, and the same thing happened.

Two men of faith, unwilling to be interrupted.

Then came the Samaritan.

The outsider. The one no one would’ve expected to help.

He slowed down and saw the man, really saw him, the blood, the dust, the shallow breath.
He knelt down, poured oil on the man's wounds, tore strips from his own robe to make bandages.
He lifted him onto his donkey, walked the rest of the road himself, and paid the man's bill at the inn.

That’s love.

Jesus told this story to remind his followers that love isn’t a concept, it’s an action.
It doesn’t wait until it's safe for certain.
It crosses the road, it pays the price, it inconveniences itself.

Love takes the risk.

Love moves toward need, even when it may be misunderstood, misused, or unappreciated.

Modern culture believes that the opposite of love is hate.
But scripture teaches us that the opposite of love is apathy.

And that’s the tension we feel with the words “I love you.”

They’re some of the most overused words in our culture.

Scribbled under Instagram selfies.

Whispered in fleeting relationships.

Tacked onto texts like punctuation.

And because of that, those same words have broken as many hearts as they’ve healed.

When love is cheap, it wounds.

When love is costly, when it sacrifices, when it inconveniences, when it doesn’t keep score, it heals.

True love, the kind Jesus embodied, isn’t soft or sentimental.

It’s hard.

It’s sacrificial.

It runs toward the very people most of us would rather avoid.

In our world, there are infinite definitions of love.

To the world, love is attraction.

Love is tolerance.

Love is just letting people do what they want.

But Scripture gives us something clearer:

• …God is love. (1 John 4:8, NIV)
• The Son is the image of the invisible God… (Colossians 1:15, NIV) (meaning Jesus is what love looks like)
• Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. (John 15:13, NIV)
• Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. (1 Corinthians 13:4-7, NIV)

And the greatest display of love the world has ever seen was Jesus nailed to a cross, arms open, offering forgiveness to the very ones who drove the nails.

This kind of love is impossible on our own.

But Jesus reassures us that His Spirit enables us to live out the same kind of love when we abide in Him.

Love is like a muscle.

If you don’t use it, it grows weak.

If you don’t stretch it, it shrinks.

Which is why love as Jesus defined it often feels so foreign, so costly.

Because it is.

Jesus even admitted that. “If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them.” (Luke 6:32, NIV).

Loving those who love us back is easy.

Loving our enemies?

That will cost us.

And sometimes the “enemies” are the people closest to us: the family members whose words left scars, the friends who disappointed us, the coworkers who cut us down.

Over time, we gather evidence against them, reasons why they’re not safe, why they don’t deserve our trust, and why we’re justified in holding back love.

But Jesus still calls us to love them, with the same love He loved us with.

So how do we do that?

Not by willpower.

Not by sentimental slogans.

But truthfully.

By surrender.

Laying down your right to be offended.

Laying down your need to be affirmed by your family.

Laying down your right to always be right.

Think about Jesus’ own life.

For decades, He sat in synagogue listening to bad sermons about Himself.

He ate meals with Pharisees who mocked Him, belittled Him, and plotted against Him.

And yet, His confidence was so deeply rooted in the Father’s love that He wasn’t thrown off by rejection, misunderstanding, or betrayal.

When He didn’t fit His disciples’ expectations, He stayed faithful.

When He didn’t meet the Pharisees’ standards, He stayed faithful.

When He hung naked on a cross, abandoned by friends, mocked by enemies, He still loved, offering forgiveness to the very ones hammering in the nails.

That’s love.

Love rooted in culture will always fail because it’s rooted in self.

Love rooted in Jesus will always endure because it flows from His Spirit.

And this is the invitation for us, to let His love re-root us. To love not because it’s easy or convenient, but because His Spirit lives in us.

Prayer

Jesus, Your love is costly. It moves toward pain, even when it’s misunderstood. Teach me to love like You. Root me so deeply in the Father’s affection that I can forgive when it hurts, stay faithful when I’m rejected, and choose love even when it costs me. Amen.

Reflection

Who is someone in your life that you have a difficult time loving? Spend the next five minutes praying for them by name, asking God to help you love them. Then, commit to praying each day this week for that love to grow.