I’m Just a Guy: Who’s Overwhelmedનમૂનો

The Lies of Self-Sufficiency

I love helping others, but for the longest time hated being helped.

It makes no sense, and I wrestled with this for years. Upon reflection, I can see how it became a bigger part of my identity after my first wife left. Suddenly, I was in unfamiliar territory as a newly single dad trying to raise two little girls. The last thing I wanted them to see was that their daddy was scared.

During that season, I made a vow to do it all for my daughters. From cooking, to cleaning, to carpool, it all rested on me. At first it was overwhelming, but over time I learned to thrive—and even took pride in doing what many would have run from.

One area of weakness was fixing their hair each day. That was new territory, and I was completely lost. But in my stubborn commitment to self-sufficiency, I found a “daddy-hair” class and enrolled. It was just a single-day course, but it gave me enough foundation that this wasn’t a weakness anymore.

From the outside, it looked like I had it all together. The girls were happy, the bills were paid, and life was moving forward. But deep down, I knew the pace wasn’t sustainable. My view of asking for help had become warped. Instead of teaching my daughters how to lean on God, I was teaching them that their dad could do it all.

Looking back, I can see how I fell into the trap the enemy laid for me. When my marriage ended, he saw me at my weakest and tried to fill that gap with busyness and responsibility, rather than allowing me to acknowledge the pain and let others come alongside me.

As men, it’s often easier to mask insecurity with tasks. When we’re busy, we feel valued, appreciated, and our sense of self-worth climbs. But the truth is, our worth has never been tied to our output.

One of the greatest parts of a relationship with Jesus is knowing that He loves us right where we are. When things are going well, He’s there cheering us on. When life pushes back, He’s right beside us. His love doesn’t rise and fall with our activity—it’s rooted in the relationship He longs to have with us.

So here’s my encouragement: stop believing the lie that your worth to God depends on how much you can get done. His favor doesn’t rest on your productivity. He isn’t asking you to prove yourself—He’s asking you to trust Him. True strength is not found in doing it all, but in resting in the One who already has.

Reflection Questions:

1. How has busyness shaped the way you see your worth?
2. What lies about productivity do you most often believe?