Thinking Biblically About Loneliness: A 5-Day Reading Planنموونە

Day 4: Causes and Factors of Loneliness

There are various social, cultural, and psychological causes of loneliness. Age, marital status, income, and cultural background all influence the experience of loneliness. The processes taking place largely in developed Western societies like urbanization and individualization, the prevalence of technology over interpersonal communication, as well as high social mobility, all increase feelings of loneliness. As does the passive use of social networks without feedback. Paradoxically, modern humans interact with many people on a superficial level, while losing close and deep relationships with significant people, eventually becoming lonely in the crowd.

The subjective causes of social loneliness can be self-centeredness, narcissism, self- destructive thoughts and behaviors (such as the expectation of rejection by others), as well as poor communication skills. We can experience emotional loneliness due to grief, pain, loss, and rejection.

Due to the non-acceptance of another culture and the awareness of their double identity (as a Christian and a representative of some culture), we will almost certainly experience cultural loneliness. Self-rejection and misunderstanding of our own identity are causes of existential loneliness. A negative image of God in the mind of a believer is the cause of spiritual loneliness.

However, for all types of loneliness, the most common reason is insecure attachment to people and God. At the root of every insecure attachment style is a distorted identity, deeply rooted and often unconscious. It determines how we see ourselves and the world, and how we feel and act. The problem is that this attachment style was formed in our childhood.

Yet there is hope. One way that spiritual loneliness, and subsequently other types of loneliness, can be overcome is through directing our efforts to change an insecure attachment to God into a secure one, by reflecting on God’s goodness and steadfast love, and by cultivating an attitude of gratitude and maintaining hope.