Relationships That Flourish: A 30-Day Devotional on Finding Security in Christ and Growing Healthy Connectionsনমুনা

Have you ever felt shame in a relationship? Maybe it was a decision you made and regretted, a hurtful message from a caretaker that burned into your memory, or a painful experience that impacted you. Sometimes the culture around us makes us feel like our worth depends on what we do—or don’t do—leaving us with feelings of shame. Regardless of the cause of our shame, this emotion can hinder our ability to move forward with confidence in our relationship with God and others.

What is the difference between shame and guilt? We feel guilty when we do something wrong and then regret it. Shame, on the other hand, makes us believe that we are inadequate or unworthy, based on something that we have done or was done to us. Shame impacts our identity at the very core. When we enter relationships believing we are undeserving, we invite pain by accepting less than the respect and care we deserve. We can break free from these shame messages and embrace the truth about who God says we are. At the beginning of Romans 8, Paul boldly proclaims that there is no condemnation for anyone who has put their trust in Jesus. He took those false identities and gave us a new one, as sons and daughters of God. We can stop condemning ourselves and believing lies about who we are. We are empowered to set our minds on the Spirit and move forward in peace.

We have already journeyed through a few resources from author and Bible teacher Susannah Baker to help us reflect on our relationships, specifically those that have brought us pain. In this exercise, she guides us through an exercise called Rebuilding Through Prayer. We can use this guide to reflect on the lies we have believed about our identity in relationships, and remember God's promise to restore and rebuild any area where we've experienced shame. We are deeply loved by God, who wants to see us walk in the freedom of His redemption.

Reflect: Is there something you believe about yourself because of shame? Write about these messages using the Rebuilding Through Prayer guide.

Pray: Lord, You are my creator and the author of my story. I surrender and release the shame messages I have been holding onto, asking You to help me see myself rightly, loved and redeemed by You.