I Don't Even Like WomenSample

FROM GOSSIP GIRL TO GOD’S GIRL

Many girls go through a “gossip girl” or “mean girl” phase in middle school or later. They taunt and exclude, manipulate and belittle.

As a result, in adulthood, many of us women are holding on to the bitterness of feeling unseen, unwanted, and unrejected in our childhood. We may be holding on to lessons we learned at that time.

If you’re mean first, the other can’t be mean to you.

If you project popularity, you insulate yourself from being hurt.

These kinds of attitudes are a part of what makes godly friendship among women so tricky to create.

What if we did the hard work of healing and forgiving and modeling what it looks like to be a woman who speaks life over others? We could flip the script from gossip girl to God’s girl. From a mean girl to a mentor, a girl who models speaking to one another after the way Jesus spoke to the disciples, after the way Jesus encouraged the disciples to speak to both friends and strangers.

In 1 Timothy 5:2, Paul writes to Timothy and encour­ages him to “reverently honor an older woman as you would your mother, and the younger women as sisters.”

Other scriptures instruct us to make wise choices in our words.

“Watch the way you talk. Let nothing foul or dirty come out of your mouth. Say only what helps, each word a gift” (Ephesians 4:29).

“Words kill, words give life; they’re either poison or fruit—you choose” (Proverbs 18:21).

Let’s tell ourselves, “I know I am loved.” And then we can unapologetically grow, individually and together.

Then we can be what we needed to other women who are on their own search for sacred sisterhood.

If you are honest, have you been the mean girl at times? Were you aware of how you were hurt­ing others? Have you changed, or do you still feel a need to be the queen bee, the most popular at any cost, even as a grown woman?