Have you ever met a person who is always negative? You know, the one who never has anything positive to say and they repetitively want to talk about everything that is going wrong in their life? Isn’t that draining? Well, the same is true when it comes to relationships.
When all you do is bring up everything your partner does wrong, you drain the life out of your relationship. It’s hard to enter the future when all you do is bring up the past. We’ve learned if we want to follow our future then we must unfollow the past.
We love what the Bible says in 1 Corinthians 13:5 (NIV). It says, “Love keeps no record of wrongs.” Paul is teaching us that if our relationships are going to be prosperous, we must let go of our partner’s mistakes. For example, when your partner makes a mistake, forgive them and don’t bring it up again. When we do this, we follow in the trend of our Heavenly Father.
Micah 7:19 teaches us God forgets our sins, throwing them into the depths of the sea. We should strive to do the same. We understand there are different levels of pain a significant other may cause. For instance, if you’ve been cheated on, but still want to work it out, it will be a process. It will take spending much time in God’s presence and possibly even counseling, but strive to move forward.
Don’t dwell in the past; if you’re choosing to stay in the past, it’s because you want to live there. In relationships, we are meant to grow, but we can’t grow if we are still holding onto our partner’s wrongs.
Romans 3:23 (ASV) says, “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” In relationships, mistakes will be made, and accidents will happen; it’s inevitable. It is how we process the mistakes with our partner that often becomes the make or break of the scenario. If you want to be in it for the long haul with your partner, you need to make them feel safe coming to you.
Your partner shouldn’t feel like they are going to get ridiculed, or that you’re going to “forgive, but never forget.” That’s not Christ, and that’s not you. Let’s be people who encourage and edify our partners’. Let’s bring out the best in them, because love always covers and encourages.
Have you been one to hold grudges or to remind your partner of the mistakes they’ve made? Why do you think that is? If you have been known to do this, how will you practice showing your partner grace?
Heavenly Father, Your word says if I don’t forgive others, You won’t forgive me. I don’t want to be the type of person who can’t forgive my partner. Help me to remind my partner of everything they do right, rather than wrong, so I can be a voice of love and encouragement in his/her life. In Jesus' name.